Sunday, May 31, 2009

Settle down...It's Sunday

After a wonderful nights sleep, we woke up today and went to Pam's house on the lake to celebrate. All the kids were there, as well as my mom and dad. We had a great time and Angie even caught a fish off Pam's dock. A 15 inch small mouthed bass. She's not sure what to do with it, and she didn't want it to die....but boy was she proud of her accomplishment. Amy patiently held her pole in the water for the remainder of the day (with no luck..sorry). Melana, Grandpa Bob, Jake and Shannon all gave fishing a try with no luck either. They just gave up a little earlier than Amy. Shannon, Angie and I took Pam's little boat out around the lake for about a half hour. The weather was beautiful and the food was delicious.

I was happy to see Megan today. I wasn't sure she would be able come up and celebrate since she had so much studying to do. This coming week is FINALS. 3 presentations and 1 final test this week alone. Ugh. Good luck hon. Thanks for partying with us even though you probably wish you were studying.

Shannon's brother Kevin, his wife Sarah and their 7 week old baby daughter joined us on Friday night for Relay. What a joy it was for all of us. Thanks...for the memories.

Amy is taking me to the shooting range for my birthday. I think it was on my bucket list. Fire a out Dukes of Hazzard.

I had a good week (minus the ear ache which is finally getting better). Rick seems to be dragging a little. I think his body is overloaded with toxins and it's starting to wear on him. He's much more tired and quiet than usual.

I'm exhausted from the crazy weekend, so I'm heading off to bed at 9:00pm. Nothing good on the tube and I don't feel like doing housework.

Thanks again to all of you who made this weekend and my birthday so VERY SPECIAL.

Keep Dreaming Big,

Saturday, May 30, 2009

Happy Birthday Dor!

How is it possible that today is only Saturday? Last night was the beginning of the Stanwood-Camano Island American Cancer Society's Relay for Life and for many of us that means that our calves are sore from walking, our eyes are tired from staying up all night and our feeling of HOPE is at it's peak. Just as we have done for the last 3 years, our friends and family met at the Stanwood High School track for an over-night camping experience that included walking laps, sharing stories and showering my parents with love and support. We want to thank those of you that turned out to walk with us and show your support. At the Closing Ceremony this morning it was announced that our event raised roughly $190,000 and there was still more money being counted!

As if Relay for Life weekend would not keep us busy enough, today is also Dor's 51st birthday. Happy Birthday Mom! For most of us celebrating our birthday on a Saturday would mean a big party or a plan to celebrate in a big way, but not Mom. She is sound asleep in bed right now recovering from last night. We are planning to celebrate her birthday tomorrow at Pam's house by the lake. We should all be recovered by then.

I have included a few pictures from the relay and added one of mom opening a birthday present (family photo of the 5 of us).

Hopeful and happy,

Wednesday, May 27, 2009


I went to my family doctor today with a bad ear ache. I woke up in the middle of the night from it pounding, so I knew I needed to do something about the EAR before the weekend came. I can't be walking around the track all night at Relay with a piece of cotton sticking out of my ear. Can I?

I'm getting used to the whole bald headed thing. As a matter of fact, I'm wondering if people used to think my hair looked bad? They keep saying how "beautiful" I look with no hair....

Tomorrow night I'm going to stay in Seattle with Melana because I have another PET scan early on Friday morning. She invited me down to spend the night and go out for dinner at one of her new "favorite restaurants" called Purple. I'm looking forward to it (Amy may even join us). The PET scan is at the University of Washington and that is about 5 minutes from her house. It will give me a chance to sleep in a little. Friday night is the start of Relay and I need all the extra sleep I can get.

Tuesday will be a big day for Rick and I. We both have chemo (which we've done before) however, it's never been the 5 hour version for both of us. The nurses are going to put us in side by side rooms and open the curtain between us so we can visit (or sleep) next to each other.

I have a massage tomorrow and I can't wait. It should be better this time now that the toxins are out of my body.

I'd better go put more medicine in my ear, then get to bed. I need to store up on some extra sleep before the weekend gets here. Don't forget, if you're not doing anything on Friday night, stop by the high school stadium and say hello. We're expecting a big crowd...and I would love to have you be a part of it.

Dreaming Big,

Tuesday, May 26, 2009


Day 1 with no hair didn't turn out as bad as I thought it might. I joined the women from work for Taco Tuesday then went up to Mt. Vernon with Cathy to look at wigs, scarves and cute new earrings. The day turned out to be a fun one.

I have so much to share but my head keeps bobbing. I'll write more tomorrow.

Until then, sleep tight..don't let the bed bugs bite.

Love, Dor

Monday, May 25, 2009

Bald is beautiful?

This afternoon I decided to take this whole hair-loss thing into my own hands. So, with the help of the girls and Aunt Vickie... and a pair of clippers.... I made it happen. We took some pictures along the way, so you might see a photo or two of me with a Mohawk one of these days. Check out the funky earrings I'm wearing. A dear old friend, Auntie Lois, brought me a whole bag of fun earrings (the concept is to draw attention away from the bald it working?) Everyone keeps telling me that I have a cute round head but I'm still not completely convinced that the GI Jane look is for me. Regardless, I'm happy that it's over.

Originally, I wanted to turn this whole head-shaving thing into a fundraiser. I thought about inviting people over and letting them take turns cutting my hair (for a small price). I pictured wine, appetizers, and laughter but when the time came it turned into a personal moment. I hope all my friends and family understand my decision to make this private.

I am going to crawl in bed with Ricky and try to rest. I haven't been sleeping much the past few days and my headaches have been annoying. I'm hoping the headaches disappeared with the hair.

Goodnight for now-
Dream Big

Sunday, May 24, 2009

Desert Aire Delight

We've been over at "the Desert" since Thursday and we're having a great time. Angie and Shannon came over on Friday night (it took over 9 hours to get here....Shannon's car had a problem on I-405, they had to get towed, then a rental car, then a 2 hour complete stop on top of the pass)....but they made it here at 11:30 pm.

Today the 4 of us stained the deck at house number 1. Actually Rick and I didn't do much. Thank goodness the girls were here. The sun was really irritating Rick's skin, and too much heat knocks me down. So, without any whining or complaining...they just took control. It looks great!

Tonight we all went to cousin Joe's for a Mexican Fiesta. Our cousin Tom and his girlfriend, Andrea cooked a Mexican dinner all day today and it was fabulous. They bought tortillas fresh off the conveyor belt in Mattawa, bought all the fruits and veggies at the "open market" that is held each weekend in town, made strawberry margaritas (I didn't have one...the thought of alcohol makes me queasy) and played Latin music through dinner. It was great fun until I got a headache and had to go home by 9:00pm.

I woke up this morning to my first pillow full of hair. I've made it through 2 full weeks without losing my hair so I had convinced myself that maybe I wouldn't lose it after all. No such luck. My pillow looked like a small rodent was taking a rest. I woke up early (everyone else was asleep) and sat at the table looking at the pile of hair that had been on my head only hours earlier. Then I cried. I didn't want to wake anyone here, so I sent a photo to my sister in law Vickie who was in Vegas and one to Amy in Seattle. I knew once they got the photo, they would call. They did. Luckily, Susie and Pat (our great neighbors at D.A.) were awake so I spent the morning with them, crying and having coffee. I'm over it now. Hopefully, the majority of my hair will stay in until I get home tomorrow night. I've decided that the best way to deal with it, is to take control. So, sometime this next will get shaved off on my terms. :)

I'm heading back to bed now. My headache is gone and I'm feeling better.

Hope you're having a safe and wonderful Memorial Day Weekend. The weather here is PERFECT!

Love you more,

Thursday, May 21, 2009

We need your help

My dear friend Bonnie Addario and I are tired of lung cancer. Tomorrow morning she is having a 3 foot by 10 foot letter delivered to Oprah regarding this REALLY BIG DISEASE. I'm attaching Bonnie's letter as well as directions to write your own message to Oprah to let her know what you think about Lung Cancer. I know what I want to say...but it contains a few bad words, so instead, I'm going to keep it clean and honest. I hope you'll do the same for me (us).

Here’s the 1-2-3 plan:

The scroll will arrive on Thursday, May 21, 2009

1. Please log on to FIRST THING on Thursday morning and pour your heart and lungs out about WHY you want to see Lung Cancer “talked about” on her show. (You will have 2000 characters).

2. We don’t want to tell you what to write and each email should be different.

3. Just mention that you hope she’s had a chance to read Bonnie J. Addario’s BIG letter.

Please send us a copy of what you wrote…if you want. If not…thank you, in advance, for giving it a go! It’s time for Lung Cancer to hit the airwaves in a BIG way.

Note: If, for any reason, the above link doesn’t take you to the “WE HEAR YOU: OPRAH’s MAIL” page…just go to www.oprah. com…you’ll find it.

Please write to Oprah on Thursday, May 21st ,and make Lung Cancer the headline it should be every day.

Thank you! Please call Sheila at 415.357.1278 with any questions, and please forward this to anyone you know who will send an email on behalf of eradicating Lung Cancer—and the 450 people dying a day, right here in the U.S

Imagine this on a 3 foot by 10 foot scroll:

Dear Oprah...

I am sending you this really big letter because I need
your help!

I watch your show as often as I can. I am constantly
amazed at how far your voice reaches and the incredible
things you have done for mankind.

Single-handedly you have saved lives and helped elect a
President. You bring issues to the public’s attention that
would not have otherwise been noticed.

I know that if you read in the newspaper or saw on
the news that a Jumbo jet just fell out of the sky you
would be alarmed.

If you read the very next day that another jet fell from
the sky you would sit up and question what was
happening. On day three, you would have Patrick
Forrey on your show and you would be demanding
answers and “guiding us home!”

I know that if you really knew about a disease that
was killing 450 people a day in the U.S. alone and
almost nothing was being done about it, you would do
something. If that disease surpassed breast cancer in
1987 as the biggest cancer killer of women you would
take action. If you heard that this disease received so
little attention and continued to kill people because of
lack of attention and funding, I am sure you would
help us. So, I am convinced you don’ t know.

Oprah...the disease is Lung Cancer and it kills over 1.3
million people worldwide every single year. 60% of the
newly diagnosed cases are people that either never smoked
or quit smoking decades ago...

I am one of the very few, accidental survivors, who live
to tell you. I just reached my 5-year survival
anniversary on March 17, 2009. I am part of a very
small club of survivors and I need your help to increase
the members. I am convinced I am here to make a
difference and God only knows, this was not my plan.

Beverly Sills, Dana Reeve, Peter Jennings, Nat
King Cole, John Wayne, James Whitmore, John
Updike, Suzanne Pleschette, George Harrison, Andy
Kaufman, Walt Disney, Herb Caen, Joe
DiMaggio, to name a few celebs, have all died from
this dreaded disease and no one talks about it. As big
as this letter is, I can’ t name all the people who have
died before their time. Perhaps you know someone near
and dear. I began this foundation the dayDana died
because it needed to happen. Her sister ,Deborah
Morosini, joined our board, immediately, and stands up
with us every day to fight this disease. I am not a
celebrity to anyone other than my beautiful children,
grandchildren, friends and now thousands of followers of
this foundation. I don't have a TV show nor do I have
a movie career where I can rally fans to help me fight
this disease.

All I have is the thought of you....will you help me
bring this jumbo disease to the forefront and get help for
so many people?

With love,
Bonnie Addario

That's it for now. Thanks in advance for your help. We'll keep you posted regarding Oprah's response.

Dreaming Big,

Monday, May 18, 2009

One step at a time...

Today marked a very different kind of day for Rick and I. We've been "dealing" with cancer in our lives for over 3 years, but to be honest we haven't done much "preparing". Not preparing to die, but rather to take care of some things so we can just keep "living". This afternoon, Rick and I met with our friend Dave, a funeral director. We met him at the cemetery where Rick's mom is buried and we picked out vacation home.... It is a beautiful spot, close to home, with a view :) In a good neighborhood. There is a kind of freedom that comes with preparing for death. I'm a firm believer when you're really prepared for won't happen like you thought. For instance, buy flood insurance and you're guaranteed to be safe from a flood. Don't buy it, and the dike breaks in your backyard. Buy an extra pair of pantyhose for a special occasion just in case you run the first won't have a run. Don't buy an extra pair and your fingernail pokes through the leg as you're putting them on. So, we bought cemetery plots today as an early 50th wedding anniversary present. We don't intend to use them until after our party (20 years from now).

Truthfully, when I told the kids what we were doing I thought they might be sad and think that we were premature in our purchase. Instead, they were the amazing kids I new they would be and said "Good for you, take control. Get what you want." Eventually, Rick or I would have to make the decision anyway so why not do it together?

I'm feeling much better this week in terms of queasiness. I do, however, need to get some rest. Hopefully tonight I'll have a little more success than last night.

Rick has chemo tomorrow morning and I'm going to take him. Originally, I thought we should make arrangements for someone to take him in case I wasn't feeling well. But, as you all know...I'm feeling great. We have to be on the road by 6:30am so I'd better get to bed.

Dreaming Big,

Counting Sheep

Oh my goodness. It's 3:00am and I'm wide awake (just as I have been since I laid down at 11:00pm). I've watched all my TIVO'd shows, loaded and started the dishwasher, read a magazine (from front to the back, including advertisement pages), had a cup of tea (no caffeine), checked my e-mail and the list goes on. Since this new chemo, my body seems to never shut down. Don't get me wrong, I'm in no hurry for my body to "SHUT DOWN", but I wouldn't mind if it went in to sleep mode every evening.

I think my hair is having a calm before the "storm". For the past 4 days I've had a "good hair day" so I'm wondering if that's what happens right before it decides to fall out? Oh well, I guess after it's gone, all my days will be "good hair days".

I had a wonderful day today (Sunday). This morning Rick and I met my parents for breakfast, then I spent the afternoon (and early evening) with my sister in law, Vickie. We went to a movie, stopped at a few stores (where we found some great gifts ~ for ourselves), laughed and cried. We only live about 5 minutes apart from one another and we still don't get together often enough.

Jake came to the house today for a few hours and helped Rick run the weed eater and other odd jobs around the property that I knew he wanted to get done. It's not that Rick can't accomplish those tasks on his own, but having Jake here to help out saves him hours of strenuous work. When Rick works that hard anymore he's worn out for days and I don't think his body appreciates it :( Thanks Bud for helping out when you can (even when the Lakers and the Red Sox are on TV - I know that was a big sacrifice)

I've decided to put my Ipod on with some headphones, pick my favorite play list and crawl back into bed. Maybe my favorite music can help me get the shut eye I need.

Hugs and Kisses (I thought using the Dreaming Big line was a bit of a stretch since dreaming takes place while you're SLEEPING)

Saturday, May 16, 2009

Saturday Night Barn Dance

We just got home after a really fun evening at the "Raise the Roof, Relay Barn Dance & Auction". Lots of people, fabulous time, more laughs than you can imagine. The kids (minus Jake and Megan ~ they were at a Fleetwood Mac concert), my parents, and a bunch of friends joined us for the event. Hopefully this will be an annual occasion.

You all know the story of Angie and Shannon's bowling shirts...well tonight wasn't a whole lot different. Today they went shopping at Value Village (again) and bought Hoe-Down outfits. I'm attaching a photo because an explanation would not be sufficient. Angie doesn't make it a habit to wear a dress, so you can imagine our hysteria when she and Shannon entered the party tonight dressed like "cowgirls". I'm still laughing out loud at the way they looked. What good sports they were.

Before we left the house tonight, Amy looked at me with really sweet eyes and said, "mom, you look so good tonight, people are going to say they want what you have". I assured her they wouldn't be wishing lung cancer on themselves and thanked her for the compliment. I think it just might have been the color pink I was wearing or maybe the tan I still have from Palm Springs. I'm attaching a photo of Rick and I so you can judge for yourself.

Someone wrote on the comments yesterday that they had a recipe for hard candy to help with mouth sores...I'd like to get a copy of that if you wouldn't mind sharing. Thanks in advance.

Since we have a big lawn and lots of weeds and today was over 70 degrees, Rick and I decided to work in the yard. Thanks to my neighbor Lynell stopping by, we now have less weeds than we did yesterday. L, you're the best.

Dreaming Big with a smile on my face,

Friday, May 15, 2009

Fabulous Friday

Whenever I get to see all my kids in the same day, it's bound to be a good one. Today was no exception.

I woke up early again (one of the side effects to chemo...I don't sleep in like usual) and decided to get moving sooner than normal. I showered, made breakfast then headed to Marysville to take care of some unfinished business. I returned home around 1:00 and I was BEAT. Luckily, I took a little snooze and was back in business this evening. Amy, Rick and I went over to the fairgrounds to help out with the Hoe-Down. We didn't do much, but we had fun trying.

This afternoon, I started to get tingling in my fingers and a couple of sores in my mouth. I'm hoping this isn't the beginning of a rough 2nd week. If it is however, I'll learn to suck it up. I've had 3 pretty great years fighting this battle, I guess a few side effects won't hurt me.

I'm very tired tonight, so I'm heading to bed. Hopefully, I'll have some photos to post tomorrow night when we return from "Raising the Roof".


Thursday, May 14, 2009


Best damned Grey's Anatomy I've ever seen. However, if I ever see Izzie or George in an elevator, I'm going to run the other way.

That's it. I just thought I'd share :)


Birthday Thursday

Although my spirits are up, I've sort of been waiting for the hammer to drop when it comes to bad chemo days. Well today came and went (along with the last 2 days) and it hasn't been too bad. I did have a massage today and even though it was very nice, I think it worked out the toxins in my body. So, this afternoon, I was feeling the aftermath of a headache.

I've been looking forward to this afternoon because the ladies from work were meeting in Mt. Vernon to celebrate Sheryl (my replacement at work) and my birthday (they are both on the same day just 5 years apart). Janeen picked me up (even with a little headache remaining) and we scooted off to have some fun. Now that I'm home, and the headache is nearly gone, I'm so glad I went. Sometimes cancer can get the best of us and to be honest, I'm sick of it taking my fun away.

This weekend is our Relay Barn Dance (not a lot different than the hoe-down I just attended in California) but rather than celebrate a birthday, we'll be raising the money and the ROOF.

Tonight is a big TV night...I know I need to get a life. Grey's Anatomy is going to be a good one and I'm hoping they vote "Coach" off on Survivor. Other than that, I'm hoping for a good night's rest and a healthy day again tomorrow.

Dreaming Big,

Wednesday, May 13, 2009

So good

Besides feeling fatigued and a little queasy, I had a good day yesterday. My mom and dad came to the house to "babysit" me just in case the day didn't go as I had planned. Thanks for all the help, you're the best! I've been encouraged to take the anti-nausea meds and steroids whether I think I need them or not for the first few days. They say it's easier to stay on top of the nausea rather than try to fix it later.

I woke up at exactly 5:30am (today) just when my next meds were due. I have an odd taste in my mouth this morning and I'm already feeling a little queasy again. Let's hope today goes as well as yesterday.

I promise to write more later. I just wanted to give you a little update so you knew things were going well.

Dreaming Big,

Monday, May 11, 2009

New Beginnings

I just returned home from my parent's house where I was cuddling in bed with my mom after her first day of this new chemo drug. She was so exhausted and filled with chemo drugs that she often said things that did not make sense. I felt so sad for her that I just squeezed her tighter and told her how great she was. It took everything I had to crawl out of that bed and drive home. I hated leaving her.

My mom had to be in Seattle at 8:30 am this morning and they left Seattle this evening around 7:00 pm. It was a very long day of treatment but she was in good company. Dad and my Aunt Vickie were Mom's caregivers today, not to mention visits from Amy and Megan at SCCA throughout the afternoon. Thank you Vickie for the love you showed Mom all day.

Mom received anti-nausea medication today that is supposed to last between 24 and 48 hours. Her doctor told us that the first three days will be the hardest for her and recommended that she have few interruptions and get a lot of sleep. Because of this, we are asking that everyone send supportive e-mails rather than calling the house for the first few days. We promise to bring the laptop to Mom and read her all of your messages when she is feeling up to it. By Thursday the doctor said she should begin feeling better. You'll all know when she is feeling better and ready to chat because you can't keep her off the phone for long!

With this new round of treatment comes some new side effects. As we previously mentioned, Mom will be losing her hair sometime between now and the next couple of weeks and she will have a compromised Immune System. Next week should be the time when her white count is the lowest, therefore causing a bigger threat to get sick. If you come to visit Mom over the next few weeks you can find hand sanitizer, face masks and just about anything else that you might need in the basket next to the front door. Thanks for helping us make this a priority!

As for those of you wondering if my parents need dinners to be made and delivered to, not at this time. We have dinner covered for the next three days and will see what they are craving after that. We appreciate the offerings however.

I attached a photo that was taken yesterday at my house for Mother's Day. Looks like a pretty happy gang if you ask me... :)

Dreaming Bigger than ever-


Sunday, May 10, 2009

Happy Mother's Day

It's 6:00am and I'm starting to wake up to get ready to come home, After a fabulous week in San Carlos, it's time for me to say my goodbyes and head back to Washington to my wonderful family (who I think might be missing me as much as I'm missing them). I know it's going to be an emotional always is when I have to say goodbye to the Addario gang.

Danielle's (Bonnie's daughter) surprise 40th birthday party hoedown last night was so fun. Andrea (Bonnie's other daughter) wanted to throw the party of the year, and I think she did it! Their friends, the food and band were all amazing. I'm really glad I stayed for the event....except when I had to say good bye to the kids last night :( It was suppose to be a happy night and I put a little wrench in that when I gave all my kisses and hugs).

Amy is picking me up at the airport this morning and we're all meeting at Angie's this evening for a barbecue. I can't wait to kiss and hug the faces of my clan. Even though I've had a wonderful time here in California, I have missed them all so much. What a better day than Mother's Day to return home. :)

I could not have picked a better time to come down here. My week was so full of stuff to do that I was able to put my new chemo adventure to the back of my brain and not worry about it.

Happy Mother's Day to all you incredible moms. Sit back and let your family spoil you, YOU'RE WORTH IT!

Keep Dreaming Big,

Thursday, May 07, 2009

Brain Overload

This week has been filled (to the brim) with more information than I'd ever imagined I could comprehend.  Today we had another doctor's appointment.  This time it was with the lung transplant doctor.  He was pretty amazing.  From the time he walked into the exam room until the time he left, he talked.  He told us everything we could possibly need to know about transplants.  I will tell you that if I ever decide to have a transplant, he will definitely be the doctor who does it.  Smart, informative, brilliant.

This morning before we went to the appointment, Carol Lin from the Lungtube interviewed me again.  Then, Bonnie and I were videotaped in the car on the way to the city.  I guess there will be a 4th "webisode" for your viewing pleasure.  

Last night we went out for dinner with a friend of Bonnie's (Deb Flannigan - Flannie as she likes to be called).  My tummy is still hurting from all the laughter.  I swear, when I get home I'm going to need to rest from all the excitement I've had.

I'm missing my family (though Bonnie and Tony are doing their best to make me feel at home).  I get home on Sunday (Mother's Day) and we're going to celebrate at Angie's.

I'll write more later, but dinner is just about ready so I'd better go help set the table.

Keep dreaming big,

Tuesday, May 05, 2009

Peaceful Cinco De Mayo

I had another great day in California with Bonnie. We slept in, drank coffee and talked all morning about how we were going to save the "world". After showers and breakfast we went into the town of San Carlos, shopped around had a pleasant lunch then headed home to get ready for our .evening.

Tonight, Bonnie, Tony and I attending a dinner party with about 150 research scientists, who are working on early detection for lung, prostrate, ovarian and pancreatic cancers. It was an amazing event to attend. They have studies in the works where dogs walk around people and smell their breath. If something is wrong with the person, the dog lays down on the person's feet. Lots of's just incredible.

I learned this afternoon before we left, that I might have another appointment in the city tomorrow with the pumonlogist then again on Thursday with the transplant team. I can not believe my time here with Bonnie and her family is almost over.

Tomorrow is Bella (Andrea's daughter) 7th birthday. They're having a big party with a bouncy house and lots of goodies. I can't wait for the fun.

I'm heading off to bed... Goodnight sleep tight, don't let the bedbugs bite.

Dreaming Big,

Monday, May 04, 2009

Dr. Appointment Update

Today was a long, but great day. I learned some really important things regarding my last PET scan, the potential for a transplant and some unknown factors.

We met Dr. Jablons around 8:00 and he discussed the possibility of a transplant. Before I could ever be put on a list, I need to exhaust all my options. Chemo, chemo and more chemo if that's what it takes. I learned that I would not need to live in California before the transplant. There would be time for me to fly down because the patient whose lungs I might receive would not be taken off life support until I arrived in California. All of this brings some comfort to my heart, but I still don't know if this procedure is for me.

I met Dr. Jahan (oncologist) after my first appointment. What a great doc. Funny sense of humor and a very smart man. At first he thought the chemo protocol I've chosen to do would not suit me as well as another combination might. Then he reviewed my PET scan and said my lungs, lymph nodes and ovary all look "hot" and active. The research trial actually scans me frequently so we'll know sooner rather than later if this new drug is working.

Ok, enough about stupid cancer. Tonight Bonnie, her girls and I went out for dinner at the Irongate (not the Lionsgate). Oh my goodness. The food was the best I've ever had. Honestly!
My stomach is still hurting from all laughing we did. As I sat with her and her daughter's tonight I truly felt like I was with family. I really love these people.

Ok, it's getting late and I didn't sleep well at all last night. A little too anxious. Tonight, I'm going to sleep like a baby.

Keep Dreaming Big,

Sunday, May 03, 2009

I finally made it!

After waiting in the airport for an extra hour and a half, I finally made it to San Francisco (actually Bonnie lives in San Carlos, just outside the city). Her kids all came by tonight and we visited around the pool and the outside fireplace. I feel like I'm sitting in the middle of Italy.

We've got an early morning tomorrow. I have to be in the city for my appointment by 8:00 so we're leaving at 6:45. Bonnie is so excited that I'm here to be evaluated by her "team". I'm so grateful to her (and Sheila) for making this happen.

We have something planned everyday that I'm here. Tomorrow night is girls night at the Lionsgate. I'm not sure what that means, but when one of the girls suggested it...they all got I'll let you know tomorrow how it went. :)

I'm attaching a few photos from our evening. The one photo is Andrea, Bonnie, Danielle and I. The other photo is my princess bed. I'm in my own little castle here. Only one little problem...I'm missing my Prince Charming.

Dreaming Big,

Saturday, May 02, 2009

Happy May Day!

Scan results came in today and they were not what I had hoped for. The cancer has not spread to other areas of my body, but the lungs are continuing to worsen and the lymph nodes between my lungs are getting larger. One of the nodes appears to be more aggressive than the others. I'm not surprised by the results because it's been almost a month since I've had any kind of treatment. Once I return from San Francisco, we'll get something going...and I'll work on kicking this cancer's BUTT.

The whole family got together tonight and we went out for dinner to Jimmy's Pizza and Pasta (one of the family's favs). At dinner we celebrated Shannon getting a great new job then after dinner we celebrated our friend Ann returning home from Iraq. We all had a great time, but the evening got away with us and we didn't get home until midnight. Now it's 1:30 and I'm having trouble sleeping so I thought I'd get on line and share my thoughts with you.

Tomorrow (today actually) is Nick Whiton's funeral (celebration of life). I'm sure it will be a very emotional day but I'm looking forward to putting my arms around Larry and giving him a hug he won't forget. I'm still struggling with how unfair Nick's passing was. He was so young, with young children, loved by so many and had lots of unfinished business. Why don't we have a cure for this disease?

I'd better get to sleep. It's going to be a very long day tomorrow.

Dream Big,