Gearing up for the 4th

Well it's time for another Independence Day at Desert Aire. Golf cart parade, Fireworks display, good food, fruity drinks, laughter, more food, water balloon fights...oh the list goes on :)

It's always nice when we go away for a long weekend to have great house sitters. This weekend is no exception. Besides taking care of the house...I'm sure the flowers will appreciate getting watered and the cows will appreciate being grain fed. Thanks for always being here for us when we're gone.

Today is Melana's birthday, so we plan on doing a little celebrating tonight with strawberry shortcake. All the kids will be joining us as well as Vickie and Tom (not to mention the whole Cherry Lane neighborhood).

I didn't feel well yesterday, but I woke up today feeling much better.  

I wrote the first part of this blog early this morning.  Things changed a little as the day went on.  I fell asleep by 9:00pm and forgot to finish writing to you.  I'm exhausted now and I promise to write something meaningful tomorrow. 

Good night for now.

Dreaming Big,

Dor

My dose of Reality

Doreen here. With a dose of reality. In case you hadn't noticed, I prefer to make margaritas out of limes (instead of lemonade out of lemons) but that's just a technicality.

This past week has been a little overwhelming for me, us. I know I've said it so many times before but we really have been LUCKY in the face of CANCER. Our battles have been fought with laughter, love and some toxins we can't seem to get away from. But lately, the battle gear has been a little more intense. I'm still trying to fight cancer with love and laughter, but I need something a little stronger than that. I need your prayers and some heavy artillery (chemotherapy).

Jake took Rick and I to our appointments today and was a trooper. We really enjoyed our time alone with you. Today's doctors visit left me again with a heavy heart. We've decided to cancel yet another drug that isn't doing it's job. (or to put it better, it's really do a job on me...not the cancer cells). I'm due for a blood transfusion soon, my port acted like it had a leak it in, so my chemo was given through my veins today instead (it took a couple tries to get a good vein...so I'm a little bruised up). I got another shot of Neulesta to stimulate my bone marrow (and cause excruciating pain in my pelvis and hips). They did a dye study of my port to make sure it was in working order and we're still debating what to do with it. When I got home I looked in the mirror to find my eyelashes have decided to make their departure (it's hard to have pretty eyes without mascara...and it's hard to put mascara on my eyelids). None of these things by themselves would cause anyone grief, but when I put them all together, I guess it is reason for some tears.

I prefer to share happy moments with all of you because I think it spreads hope that we can all beat this thing. I've been winning for over 3 years so I have so much to be thankful for. My glass is half full (of that margarita I was talking about earlier) and I plan on keeping it that way.

I must say that on Sunday when Amy was at the house and I was going through my morning ritual of gagging, coughing, sweating, coughing some more, etc., I didn't think much of it. I do it every day. Rick hears it and has adjusted, every once in a while he knocks on the bathroom door and says "hey, are you ok in there?". I forget that if you're not a part of it every day, it can sound scary and I'm sorry about that. Once, I finally get some of the fluid up from the bottom of my lungs, I actually feel better. Then, I take meds to keep the cough under control the remainder of the day and start over the next morning. This is my new normal.

Rick had another uneventful chemo day. He had lots of work to do once we got home so he went back to the office until after 7:00pm. He was bushed when he got home. He had a little dinner (thanks to Lindsay Smith) then went straight to bed. I hope he gets a good nights rest. He really needs it. I know he has a lot of pressure on him to stay as healthy as possible. He's still the breadwinner, the man who brings home the health insurance, and still tries to keep up with things that need to be done at home.

That is as much "real" as I can dish out in one day. I'm attaching a photo that my friend Cindy took (she came to visit me during chemo since she knew I'd be in town...I met here while she was a patient there and we became instant friends). The photo is how Rick and I were set up today during our infusion. He was in room 27 and I was in 28. Jake sat between us and kept us company.

I got this from a friend today and it's suppose to be about Sisters. I believe it's for all the people I love so I wanted to share it with you:

Life is too short to wake up with regrets.
So love the people who treat you right.
Love the ones who don't just because you can.
Believe everything happens for a reason.
If you get a second chance,
Grab it with both hands.
If it changes your life, let it.
Kiss slowly.
Forgive quickly.
God never said life would be easy.
He just promised it would be worth it.

Dreaming Big,
The "Real" Doreen

Being Real

Most of the time Dor is very upbeat and positive when she is writing her blog entries. I guess to be fair, she is upbeat and positive about life in general. That is one of the many reasons why you guys love her. She has truly tried her best to make lemonade out of the lemons she has been handed the past few years. Lately though, mom and I have had the important discussion about writing for the purpose of being positive versus writing for the purpose of really showing what lung cancer looks like. I often ask her what the intent of the blog is... in her opinion. She is not "real" nearly as often as she could be. She paints a pretty picture most of the time so I often wonder if you are reading between the lines. I will stop by the house and see that she is shivering and wrapped in blankets, or sweaty and borderline delirious with a temperature of 103 (and has been most of the day), yet the blog entry the following morning will be about how she planted new flowers in the yard and had coffee with her friends. I appreciate her upbeat attitude but I try to remind her that it's ok to be "real". She tells me that she doesn't want pity from anyone. I try to remind her that she invited all of you on this journey with her and that it's ok to be honest when the flight has a little turbulence.

So here is the real story about how things have been lately. I was at my parents house on Sunday morning as we all got ready to attend a BBQ at their neighbors house. The steam from taking a shower has been hard on my mom for quite a while but I had no idea how quickly it has gotten worse. I will tell you, it's one thing to SEE her cute bald head or SEE her fatigued and say "it's sad to see the cancer affecting her", it's totally different to stand outside of the bathroom door and HEAR what lung cancer sounds like. The picture is not nearly as pretty as mom tends to paint. It is 45 minutes of coughing, gaging, sweating, more coughing, leaning over the sink with her mouth open hoping the fluid that is drowning her will fall into the sink and provide some relief. Watching someone struggle and knowing there is nothing you can do to help is one of the worst feelings in the world.

She called me a little while ago to tell me how things are going down in Seattle today. I was in a meeting and couldn't talk long but none of the news sounded overly positive. Nothing was horrible, but there was talk of her likely having a transfusion soon, and how they are only giving her one of the two chemos today because her body seems to be having a hard time with one of them. They can't figure out why she keeps having problems with a high temperature, and it sounds like her counts are starting to fall again. As of my last phone call with her, they were still waiting for news about my dad but they did know that his CEA counts have continued to climb and have now hit 35. For those of you who don't speak "cancer talk", we want moms counts to go UP and Dad's counts to go DOWN but today it was just the opposite.

We know how lucky we have been as a family over the past few years. We have been given far more time together than the doctors ever thought we would. We have had lots of good times and a few not-so-good times. I have no doubt that their positive attitudes have kept them alive so I anticipate they will continue to find the positive in everything that happens. It's the hard times that bring a family together so we will continue to embrace this time.

Fasten your seat belts, we are experiencing a little turbulence-

Amy

Chemo Eve

My mom and dad are going to drive Rick and I to Lynnwood in the morning to meet up with Jake who will be our chemo boy all day tomorrow. He has a softball game in Mt. Vernon tomorrow night so we figured after the appointment he could just drop us off at our house before heading north. Now that he has the summer off from school, we hope that he can share in some of the "fun". I know the reality of treatments are something he would like to avoid, but I think it's good for him sometimes to meet with our amazing nurses and docs. They help him feel better about what's going on in our lives.

I'm pretty fatigued today so I think I'll finish this blog and call it a night.

Talk to you all tomorrow if I can stay awake long enough after I get home from Seattle.

Dreaming Big,
Dor

Too tired to sleep...

You know how sometimes you're just so tired, it's hard to fall asleep? That's where I am right now. My eyes are struggling to stay open, but my insides are screaming "no not yet". So here it is, 5 am, jammies on, took my meds, Rick is in bed with the sheets all warmed up and my body is saying, "no, let's have another glass of water or a snack. Maybe we could a crossword puzzle then we can go to bed"? I said "forget it". Now it's time to wake up. I'll just have to take a nap sometime today instead.

Today we are going to our neighbors, Jeff and Ericka's house. Ericka's grandparents grew up next to my in laws and they will be in town for the weekend. We're all going down to their house to catch up on old times. Hopefully, both families will be able to make it for the visit. They used to have great times together. I'm sure many of the old stories will come out. I'm just not sure "which version" we'll get to hear. :)

I'm still feeling much better than yesterday. Let's hope it stays that way. Rick and I both have chemo again on Tuesday so I'd like to start the week on a good note. Jake will be our chauffeur to and from our appointments now that school is out.


Ok, I'm going to crawl back under the covers and o my best to fall asleep.

Wide awake but always dreaming,
Dor

Bad Day, Ugh!

Yesterday would not be considered one of my better days in life. As a matter of fact, it might be near the top of the bad ones. I started the morning with a low grade fever (nothing out of the ordinary...this has been happening since I started on chemo), but by noon it had shot up to 103 degrees. Oops! A little too high. I spent the rest of the day at the doctor's office having blood work done, a new chest x-ray and a urinalysis. They needed to find out what was generating this fever. It appeared I was heading for the hospital, until my fever broke while we were waiting for some results (and I was packed in ice). I wasn't very happy about going to the hospital (that is where sick people go and I wasn't ready to give in yet!). Once I got home, I slept the remainder of the day.

Today has been wonderful. No fever over 99.6. I feel good. I've been taking it easy all day only doing odd jobs around the house. Tonight Rick went to play cards with some old high school buddies so, Reid picked him up and dropped Cathy off at the house to play with me. Actually, we've made cookies, watched a movie, talked, laughed, talked some more. All in all, it's been a great day.

While I was laying in bed yesterday, our dear friends Ann and Michael came up and worked in our yard for an hour. It looks great. Thanks guys!

Gotta go check on my cookies (and my guest).
Dreaming Big,
Dor

Clam Digging?

I was feeling pretty good this morning, rested, not queasy.... So I thought I would go clam digging with my Dad and Angie (Mom stayed in the car). My original thought was that I could dig some clams, perhaps be helpful, bring the clams back to the van, (just do whatever was needed of me). I have told you lately how much lung cancer sucks? I was winded before I ever got to the beach, I helped Angie get about 30 clams, walked them back up the hill (while sucking breath), then sat in mom and dad's van for the next 30 minutes trying to catch my breath. Clam digging was nothing like I remember.

Something great happened due to the clam digging... When we got back, we cleaned and ground the clams for chowder. Once I got back to the house, I made a huge stockpot filled with chowder (some for Angie to take home) and I must say...it was delicious. Fresh clam chowder on a blustery day. Now that's what I call a joyous afternoon.

I'm attaching some photos. It's a dirty job, but somebody's gotta do it.

Love you more than all the clams we saw spitting at the beach today.

Dreaming Big,
Dor

Pet Scan Results

I heard from Dr. Eaton this morning about my PET/CT scan and this is what he had to say: The tumors are all stable in size according to the CT scan. 2 areas of concern are my lower left and lower right lung. Though they have remained the same size, the activity of the cancer is higher than it was a couple of weeks ago. Because the activity didn't change dramatically, I will remain on this program for 2 more cycles. That should put me at the end of July.

I felt pretty good most of the day. I got some odd jobs done, napped for a good portion of the afternoon, had dinner made for Rick when he got home in case I was napping (which I was) and didn't have to rely on anti-nausea medicine to get me through the day. I hope tomorrow will be as successful.

Rick is feeling good today, as well. When he feels good, it helps me feel better. No news yet from the specialist who is going to do his liver procedure in Seattle, but we just heard about it yesterday. I guess I need to be a little more patient. :)

Amy added a link on my blog site for anyone interested in joining our team for the Bonnie J. Addario "Golden Gait 5K" - 5K Walk/Run. The girls in California have assured me that they'll send our shirts whether we go the event or not. Just know that your $25 entry fee will sign you up and start adding towards our goal. So far, I think we have about 10 team members and have raised $550 dollars. Bonnie says "Walk. Run. Sit. Sprint. Sprawl. Crawl. Dance. Prance. Stroll. Cajole. Saunter. Meander. Hop. Skip or Jump" Whatever your choice ~ Break your stride for Lung Cancer. I love that Bonnie Girl....I wish you all had the opportunity to meet her. You would understand why I have such a passion for eradicating lung cancer.

Until tomorrow...
I'm just dreaming big,
Dor

Tuesday Updates

Hi everyone! I'm going to make this quick and head back to bed...but here's what we learned today. My PET scan results did not make it back to my doc so we don't know anything new about me. (they are read by someone other than the regular person because it's a research trial and that guy is gone right now so hopefully I'll learn something tomorrow. It doesn't matter however because I was going to get the chemo anyway) . I told Dr. Eaton that I've had a rough couple of weeks and he offered me the opportunity to stop...I said no thank you. I'll adjust to the inconveniences.

Rick's CT scan showed that most of his tumors were stable or a little smaller except for the ones in his liver. So, the new game plan is to inject chemo directly into his liver as a condensed version of the drug. We're hoping that this is just what his body needs. We'll learn more about it in the next couple of weeks.

For those of you who read this blog earlier and were worried that I'd had a stroke (all the jibberish) I want to assure you that I'm fine. The computer starting typing it's own letters and I couldn't shut the computer off. Sorry if I scared you.

I slept for about 5 hours this afternoon so I think I'll be up most of the night. It's ok though because I'm feeling pretty good and I have lots of things TIVO'd.

Dreaming (with my eyes wide open) Big,
Dor

Here's What's Happening...

I've been worried for the past few days that I wasn't going to have a really good day before it was time to have chemo again. Yahoo, I woke up today feeling GREAT. Today, Rick's sister Vickie took Rick and I to our appointments. We both had scans so we won't know anything until tomorrow.

Now for some news:

I got a wig (cranial prosthesis) today. (I'm attaching a photo of me with my sister in law...I'm the blonde one on the left)

On Wednesday night, June 24 during the Oakland A's and San Francisco Giants game it will be the Bonnie J. Addario Lung Cancer Foundation night. Bonnie (and a little girl, Emma who won an essay contest about lung cancer) will be throwing in the first pitch. Bonnie also told me that a little tease of the lungblog (with Jake and I in it) will be on the big screen. So, if you get satellite TV you might be able to watch it. She said there will be a big group of people with green shirts and lung cancer signs all over the stadium. Hopefully the cameras will zoom in on them. I am so excited that her foundation has brought so much awareness to this disease. Keep up the great work Bonnie. You're the best.

Amy and Melana ran a 5K in the Lance Armstrong Livestrong event that was held in Seattle on Sunday. I'm so proud of them for participating. Amy brought home a shirt for Rick and I that says, Game on, Cancer. I love them.

I forgot to mention this last week. Jake got a job back with the Stanwood Camano School District for next year. He's so excited to know what his future looks like. Megan just has a year left at the University of Washington, then she'll be done.

Angie is taking Rick and I to our appointments tomorrow. It's always so nice to have someone else at our appointments with us. They are great at taking notes and being moral support. I have chemo (as long as my counts are good) and Rick has a follow-up appointment to see if his chemo cocktail is working. Please keep us in your thoughts and prayers.

I'm attaching a few photos from father's day as well. I hope you enjoy them.

Dreaming Big,
Doreen

Happy Father's Day

Father's Day is a very special day for me because most you you know...I have the greatest DAD in the World. Not just because that what his card says, but because he displays all the qualities needed for that honor. He loves us ALL unconditionally, would do anything for ANYONE, he is EVERYBODY'S GRANDPA BOB, still loves my mother after all these years, forgets that he's 76 years old and wants to do everything he can, to help Rick and I. He doesn't take no for an answer, he's honorable, loving and the kindest man you'd want to know. He's my Hero! Thank you Dad for being who you are, all you've done, and all you'll continue to be.

To all the other Dads in my life....thank you, too. Thank you for being coaches, mentors and shoulders to cry on. Thank you for taking a firm stand (when you know it's for own good), giving hugs when we need it most, believing in us when we know we can do something, and forgiving us when we apparently couldn't. Thank you for your love. Thank you for your time. But, most of all...thanks for being you!

Let's take the time to Celebrate Dads ~

I've attached a photo of my dad and I right after my diagnosis. Isn't he cute?

Love you more,
Dor

Thursday night insomnia

It's been a few days since my last post but I haven't been in much of a mood to share. Since Tuesday, I've been housebound (working hard at getting my blood counts up) all the while....keeping my spirits up! With all the pain I've been having in my lower back, hips, pelvis I think that the bone marrow shot they gave me last week is doing it's job. I finally got out of bed 10 minutes ago because the pain is so intense I keep waking myself up from the trembling.

This evening, Amy had a few people over to the house to have a "little spa treatment" She purchased the spa basket at a Relay for Life Auction. We had a great time and bought a few items to keep us all looking and feeling our best. Thanks Amy for letting us be a part of your spa adventure. My feet feel fabulous and one side of my face looks amazing....now I need to do the other side so I don't look like I've had a stroke. Hopefully, my products will arrive soon :)

We don't have many things planned for the weekend. Maybe a little work around the house, a movie, dinner reservations?, trip to Costco, then we're wrapping up Sunday with a BBQ for both of our dads.

Monday is a busy day. I have a PET scan and CT scan at 8:45am at the University of Washington, then at noon Rick has a CT scan over at Seattle Cancer Care. At 1:00 that day I have an appointment to be fitted for my "cranial prosthesis - wig". I'm not sure if you'll see me wearing it much, but you never know. Stranger things have happened. On Tuesday, we both get results then I'll get chemo. (Rick has this week off from chemo treatments). As usual, we are anxious for the results. I just need to hear the word STABLE so I can continue the treatment plan I'm on. We would like to hear the word SHRINKAGE from Rick's oncologist. His counts have continued to raise slowly, but we're hoping the tumors are shrinking in size. Again, we'll know more on Tuesday afternoon. When we know something...so will you.

It's now almost 1:30 and I think the Tylenol (arthritis strength) is kicking in. I'm going to try the sleep thing again. If it doesn't work, you might be hearing from me again tonight.

Sleep well, and if you're lucky enough to still have your daddy...don't forget to let him know how much you love him.

Dreaming Big,
Dor

Early Morning Update

Thanks for the blog update, Amy. It's 3:00am and my "wishbones" woke me up so I thought I'd stay up long enough to drop you all a little note. To all of you blog readers, thanks for keeping Rick and I in your thoughts and prayers...we can feel the love surrounding us.

This chemo is quite different than anything I've had before. Not that it's so terrible, it's just very different. The first week is a quick dose of a drug that I barely even know I've gotten. By week 2 however, the dose is longer, stronger and they've added 2 additional drugs. At the beginning of week 2 I don't feel much different than fatigued, but by this time in the treatment, I've really got to watch the low grade fevers, ACHY hips, pelvis, knees, thighs (they gave me a shot so my body would over produce bone marrow to keep me healthy...I think it's working), nausea, loss of appetite (finally a new diet plan) and just an overall feeling of not feeling like my self. I've done a lot more resting than usual and it seems to be helping.

I've gotten used to the bald head (though I still have follicletis - an inflammation of my hair follicles) so my scalp has a little rash on it. I'm getting more and more accustomed. Now I don't scream when I see my reflection in a mirror or window or a glass of water :)

Today (technically yesterday since it's now 3:15am on Tuesday), I got an incredible gift of kindness. As you all know, I am so grateful for the outpouring of love and support I get from so many of you. From dear old friends, to some I only know through the blog, to some of you I've never met. Here's what happened: About a month ago I received the most incredible flower arrangement I had ever seen from a dear friend of Amy and Angie's, named Sabrina. It was sent to me from the Tulalip Casino's new flower shop, Salal Floral (I didn't even know they had one there). When Sabrina ordered the flowers she shared the "story of our family" to the shop owner and shared how much she loved our family over the years and what great people she thought we were. Long story short, they decided to "adopt" us and I got an e-mail from the flower shop saying they would like to send me a fresh bouquet twice a month as a kind gesture in hopes that it would keep our spirits high. Oh, my goodness. Me and fresh flowers? Are you kidding? I'm going to be elated. They will bring them every other Thursday...Am I blessed or what?

We were hoping Dave and Val would be moving in this week but it looks like there is a little glitch in the 3rd parties money. Too much feet dragging. I believe it's all going to work out, they just need our good thoughts to help push everything in the right direction. I guess it will be a little longer before the "partying starts"...Just kidding, our partying needs to be during the daylight. Otherwise, we've all fallen asleep in our chairs or on the couch. Don't worry about stopping by and interrupting our parties...you might just be waking us up :)

Well, now that's it's 3:30 and my tylenol has kicked in a little, I think I'll wrap my hips back up with a heating pad and try the sleeping "thing" again.

We're hoping this week Jake learns something about his job. They re posted a bunch of them and I think he applied for all the was qualified for. School is officially out on Wednesday, so let's hope they learn something soon. Megan has the rest of this week off then it's back to school again for her. I think the kids are going to spend a few days over at Desert Aire for relaxation and sun before Megan has to go back for her last set of classes. Once summer quarter is over, it all just hands on stuff for her. 3 months at 3 different sites. Then...she's done :) It's been a long journey, but well worth it.

Angie is officially out tomorrow so she'll join me at my next "result" appointment next Tuesday. It's nice when summer vacation comes around. The kids have more opportunities to join us at appointments and ask questions. It's also nice just to spend quality snuggling time with them. They can crawl right into the hospital bed during the infusion and no one cares.

Sorry to say this, but Amy doesn't just "get time off". She's got a great job and they will let her take time off and make it up as she needs to, but like the other 2 kids....she doesn't have an assigned "summer off". She does however join me at lots of appointments and I'm happy they give her the freedom to do that when needed.

Vickie is taking me on Monday for my PET scan then we're going to a "get beautiful" class that the University of Washington puts on for cancer patients who've lost their hair. We should have a great time. And you never know. I might come home with a cute blonde wig?

Ok, enough blabbering...time to head to bed. Someone (ME) needs their beauty sleep desperately. I should have been in be by 7:30 tonight :)

Dreaming with achy hip bones...which are connected to my pelvis bone, connected to my thigh bones, connected to my knee bone, connected...well you get the picture :)

Love, Dor

Checking In

Dor hasn't been writing much lately so I thought I would give everyone a quick update on their status.  Dad seems to be really tired these days.  I haven't heard him complain about being in pain or having chemo symptoms, but we can all tell that he is tired from the constant treatment.  He has been going thru treatment for a long time without a break.  Personally, I think the guy deserves a week on a beach in Mexico.  

Mom has been under the weather the past few days.  For those of you who saw her at the parties on Saturday, you know that she over did it.  She spent most of Sunday in bed with a fever that hovered around 101.  She told us that she felt a little better today but was having a hard time getting used to the new treatment.  She said her hips are sore.  She keeps mentioning that her hips feel like a wishbone, ready to break at all times.  The new chemo is known to mess with a cancer patients bone marrow so this will be something that we keep an eye on.

Sometimes it's easy to forget that mom is sick because she is so upbeat and funny.  Other times, like the past few days, she has been a normal cancer patient.  These side effects aren't expected to last forever, but as long as the fever continues we will keep a closer eye on her.

We are hoping tomorrow will be a better day for both of them.  Dad has chemo in Seattle.  His sister Denise has volunteered to take him so mom can stay home and rest.  It's always hard to tell how my dad is feeling because he has always been so quiet.   We are hoping that mom takes advantage of her day at home and gets some rest.  She should stay off of her "wishbones" and keep an eye on her fever but she will probably end up at Starbucks with one of her friends.  Oh well, life's too short to pass up a cup of coffee.

Sleep tight.

Amy

Over did it and I have no one to blame but myself :(

As you all knew, we had a very busy weekend planned. a baby shower yesterday morning as well as 2 graduation parties yesterday afternoon. I had a wonderful time at each of them but but last night at Ally's graduation party, I was beginning to feel warm and laid down until we were ready to leave the party. By the time we got home, my temperature had spiked to 101.2 and I was feeling pretty lousy. Thought I didn't sleep well last night, I must say I'm feeling much better this morning.....

Sorry for not listening to you Eric, and leaving the party earlier. I could hear your little voice in my head all night long....

I'm going to head back to bed and try to catch up on my much needed sleep from last night.

Dreaming Big,
Doreen

Quick little update

I started out yesterday morning feeling pretty good. By the afternoon, I could feel the effects of the steroids working on my body and my skin felt like it was crawling. Today, I woke up feeling great, my friend Kim stopped by for a visit and by 3:30 I was feeling pretty cruddy again. I could feel a fever coming on and I was a bit queasy. I just need to get my body adjusted to these new drugs and then I'll be ok. I'm just not sure what to expect from week to week yet. Dave and Val stopped by to talk about the new adventures of the "4 Musketeers".

Dave and Val are in the middle of building their retirement home in Plain, Washington. We are so excited for their journey, but they are running into a few glitches along the way. We are willing and able to help with some of their problems, by inviting them to stay with us while they finish their building. Housemates at 50? We'll have the best time.... They accepted our offer (though Dave thinks he's going to make a bunch of the rules). We were hoping they would move in next week, but there are still a few things to work out with their buyers. I think we are all excited to spend more time together. I'm very sure that having them around will be as helpful for Rick and I as it will be for them.

I'm heading off to bed now with big hopes of waking up feeling great tomorrow. I've got a busy weekend planned with baby showers and graduation parties. I need to start feel better soon.

Love you more than all the beautiful flowers blooming on my porch :)
Dor

Blog Post number 900...

I either need to start talking less or have my blog printed in book form. Somehow, I'm running out of space. Ugh.

Chemo went ok today. It was a long day and I fell immediately asleep when I got into Cathy's car this afternoon. I don't think I was much fun on the ride home. (Well I don't remember anything if that gives you a clue). I've been sleeping ever since I got home so now I'm awake and thought I would drop you a line to get you up to date on what's happening.

After the 2 doses of chemo, they shot me in the arm with Neulesta (a drug to build up my bone marrow over the next couple of weeks since these drugs tend to do a number on your blood counts). That seems to be the only thing that hurt tonight. The needle shot in my arm. I woke up around 7:00pm feeling a bit nauseous but I took something for that before it got out of hand and I'm already feeling better.

Tomorrow, Rick and I go in for eye exams and new glasses. My vision has gotten worse over the past couple of years, I think that's an AGE thing. I forgot I can actually blame some of my faultering body on age rather than cancer related stuff.

I'd better get back to bed before I wake myself up completely.

Dream Big Happy Dreams,
Love you MORE ~ Dor

Photo Shoot

Today I had a little photo shoot with my friend Noel. She spent a couple of hours making me feel beautiful (with or without something on my head). I try to be the person on the side of the camera taking the photos...not the one in them...so the first few minutes seemed~oh, so uncomfortable. I've posted some pictures from today's adventure. Hope you like them.

This afternoon, Amy and I went to Mt. Vernon to sit with some friends at the hospital. Their mom/mother in law has just been diagnosed with lung cancer and they needed some 1st hand guidance. Those first few days after diagnosis are so scary. Ok, all the days are scary, but we just learn to adapt as time goes on. We were there to help ask some of the questions you wouldn't necessarily know if you didn't know much about lung cancer. I wish them all the best on this new journey their family will be taking.

Tomorrow is another busy chemo day. I'll get the 2nd part of my Gemzar/Taxotere treatment. I've got a busy weekend coming up with Pam's daughter's baby shower and 2 graduation parties. I hope this treatment doesn't knock me down too much. I'm a busy woman with things to do, places to go, people to see :)

It's getting late so I think I'll go fold some laundry and get ready for bed. 5:45am comes early for me. I have to be ready to leave by 6:30 and since I don't have any hair to fix...I can get up 15 minutes later than usual :)

Until tomorrow, Dream Big~
Dor

Wide awake at 3:20am

Late night at Desert Aire. Our friends Mark and Debbie and their daughters joined us over here today to take a look at house number one, visit, and spend the night before they went on to their next journey (a graduation party in Qunicy). We BBQ'd then sat outside in our courtyard chatting until midnight. The only problem I have...no such luck with falling asleep since we came in the house. Everyone else is sound asleep (sawing logs) and I'm wide awake with no one to talk to.

Rick had a successful morning at the livestock auction (I didn't go with him since I woke up with a headache, but it went away before he returned home and I had the car packed and ready to go). He bought 5 steers from some deserving young kids who had been raising them since they were calves. He however didn't feel well when he got home. So I fed him some lunch and we got in the car and headed over. He was feeling much better this evening. He thinks maybe he was just a little hungry (and needed some of my cooking).

The weather over here today when we arrived was a beautiful 73 degrees. Nice...Not to hot...not too cold. We took advantage of the heat (or lack of heat) because those days over here come few and far between.

I guess I'll go back to bed and see if my luck changes in the sleep department.

Dreaming (ok, not really) Big...
Love you MORE,
Dor

Hot June Night

The temperature outside appears to be just like yesterday, but for some reason I'm not feeling as miserable from the heat today. Perhaps it's because I've been hit with a fatigue bug that has me just laying around. This afternoon, I unloaded my dishwasher and could hardly lift the dishes up into my cupboard. I know...it's sounds ridiculous. I actually have a little more energy now. Perhaps it was just a warning to slow down in the heat.

I started this blog earlier today...and I think I may have spoken to soon. It ended up being equally as hot as yesterday. They say, tomorrow is suppose to be 15 degrees cooler. Yahoo!

We've got another busy weekend planned. I guess it's a good way to keep our mind off all the things that can bring us down. Tomorrow night is our niece's 2nd birthday party, then it the annual Livestock Auction, then a quick trip over to Desert Aire. Then, I start the next batch of toxins that are going to change my life. (Positive Thinking)

Have a peaceful night and keep dreaming big,
Doreen

We're having a "heat wave"

When I wrote yesterday, I was feeling a little bummed that the chemo didn't work as planned, but I'm feeling better about it today. The reason I opted to do this research trial was so I didn't waste time on a treatment plan that wasn't working. In my case, this first batch didn't work, so I'm on to the 2nd plan. I had to remind myself what the purpose of this option was for. I'm ok now. Just waiting for the drugs to start doing their job :) Unless the tumors start growing in size and activity, I know I will get to remain on this plan for the next 3 cycles. That will be almost 3 more months. And in cancer time...that's almost 7 years :)

I woke up around 5:30am needing an anti-nausea pill. I've been feeling fine ever since. Maybe it was just a reminder to get up early and water my plants outside before the temps get up to the predicted 90 degrees....what's that all about anyway?

Chemo went as planned for Rick yesterday. Same stuff, different day. We keep wondering why his CEA counts aren't going down (knowing that the tumors are shrinking), but the doctors aren't concerned about it. They say the numbers are still low (it's just that we know they've been lower...) we just want it all. Smaller tumors AND lower counts. Patience, Doreen...Patience....

Enough about us...hope you're all doing well. Don't forget to ~ Hydrate, Hydrate, Hydrate during this heatwave.

Dreaming Big (and very warm)
Dor

Starting Over....

Not the news I was hoping for, but perhaps the new plan will be better than the last. The activity of the cancer didn't slow down enough for me to continue on the Carbo/Taxol Chemo routine. So, today I started something new. Then next Tuesday, I'll be back for another dose of this and something new. I'll give you all the details tonight when I write again. I'm already done for the day, Rick is still upstairs for another 1/2 hour.

Rick's CEA count is creeping back up (but very slowly). No one seems to be alarmed by it, so I'm not going to worry yet either. He is very tired but doesn't plan on giving up the fight anytime soon.

I'll write more later.

Dreaming Big,
Dor

Chemo Eve

About the photos from yesterday...I did not give my permission for that terrible photo of me driving the boat to be put on the blog. The one with Angie holding her fish...now that was nice. After I wrote the blog last night and went to bed, Angie (who is now grounded until she's 35) got back on the computer and put those photos on the blog...boy is she in trouble. She did try to explain it away by saying it was the only photo she had of me on my own birthday party.

Today was sort of laid back. I spent the afternoon with my sister in law. We did a little job at her work, then went to lunch, stopped by Amy's work to say hello, then finished up by doing a little grocery shopping. I got home early enough to open all the windows to air the house out before Rick got home. The weather was beautiful today...but inside the house it was 80 degrees. (it felt a lot like an easy bake oven)

Tomorrow is a big chemo day. Hopefully all is going well with Rick's treatments, he seems a little more worn out than usual, but we've been doing a lot of things lately to cause fatigue. I will find out if the PET scan showed shrinkage in the tumors. If not, I will most likely start a brand new chemotherapy tomorrow instead. We'll keep you posted on that when the time comes.

I feel asleep on my bed around 6:30 tonight and woke up to a phone call from Jake. Megan just found out where all her internships will be next year. The first one will be at Northsound in Mukilteo, then at a nursing home in Arlington, and she will finish out in Spokane at St. Luke's Hospital.

Ok, it's time for me to say goodnight. 5:45 am will come early tomorrow. The really good perk is, I don't have to spend a lot of time on my hair :) Shower, make-up, clothes...I'm done

Dreaming Big positive thoughts for tomorrow,
Dor

Settle down...It's Sunday

After a wonderful nights sleep, we woke up today and went to Pam's house on the lake to celebrate. All the kids were there, as well as my mom and dad. We had a great time and Angie even caught a fish off Pam's dock. A 15 inch small mouthed bass. She's not sure what to do with it, and she didn't want it to die....but boy was she proud of her accomplishment. Amy patiently held her pole in the water for the remainder of the day (with no luck..sorry). Melana, Grandpa Bob, Jake and Shannon all gave fishing a try with no luck either. They just gave up a little earlier than Amy. Shannon, Angie and I took Pam's little boat out around the lake for about a half hour. The weather was beautiful and the food was delicious.

I was happy to see Megan today. I wasn't sure she would be able come up and celebrate since she had so much studying to do. This coming week is FINALS. 3 presentations and 1 final test this week alone. Ugh. Good luck hon. Thanks for partying with us even though you probably wish you were studying.

Shannon's brother Kevin, his wife Sarah and their 7 week old baby daughter joined us on Friday night for Relay. What a joy it was for all of us. Thanks...for the memories.

Amy is taking me to the shooting range for my birthday. I think it was on my bucket list. Fire a pistol...watch out Dukes of Hazzard.

I had a good week (minus the ear ache which is finally getting better). Rick seems to be dragging a little. I think his body is overloaded with toxins and it's starting to wear on him. He's much more tired and quiet than usual.

I'm exhausted from the crazy weekend, so I'm heading off to bed at 9:00pm. Nothing good on the tube and I don't feel like doing housework.

Thanks again to all of you who made this weekend and my birthday so VERY SPECIAL.

Keep Dreaming Big,
Dor

Happy Birthday Dor!

How is it possible that today is only Saturday? Last night was the beginning of the Stanwood-Camano Island American Cancer Society's Relay for Life and for many of us that means that our calves are sore from walking, our eyes are tired from staying up all night and our feeling of HOPE is at it's peak. Just as we have done for the last 3 years, our friends and family met at the Stanwood High School track for an over-night camping experience that included walking laps, sharing stories and showering my parents with love and support. We want to thank those of you that turned out to walk with us and show your support. At the Closing Ceremony this morning it was announced that our event raised roughly $190,000 and there was still more money being counted!

As if Relay for Life weekend would not keep us busy enough, today is also Dor's 51st birthday. Happy Birthday Mom! For most of us celebrating our birthday on a Saturday would mean a big party or a plan to celebrate in a big way, but not Mom. She is sound asleep in bed right now recovering from last night. We are planning to celebrate her birthday tomorrow at Pam's house by the lake. We should all be recovered by then.

I have included a few pictures from the relay and added one of mom opening a birthday present (family photo of the 5 of us).

Hopeful and happy,

Angie

Earache?

I went to my family doctor today with a bad ear ache. I woke up in the middle of the night from it pounding, so I knew I needed to do something about the EAR before the weekend came. I can't be walking around the track all night at Relay with a piece of cotton sticking out of my ear. Can I?

I'm getting used to the whole bald headed thing. As a matter of fact, I'm wondering if people used to think my hair looked bad? They keep saying how "beautiful" I look with no hair....

Tomorrow night I'm going to stay in Seattle with Melana because I have another PET scan early on Friday morning. She invited me down to spend the night and go out for dinner at one of her new "favorite restaurants" called Purple. I'm looking forward to it (Amy may even join us). The PET scan is at the University of Washington and that is about 5 minutes from her house. It will give me a chance to sleep in a little. Friday night is the start of Relay and I need all the extra sleep I can get.

Tuesday will be a big day for Rick and I. We both have chemo (which we've done before) however, it's never been the 5 hour version for both of us. The nurses are going to put us in side by side rooms and open the curtain between us so we can visit (or sleep) next to each other.

I have a massage tomorrow and I can't wait. It should be better this time now that the toxins are out of my body.

I'd better go put more medicine in my ear, then get to bed. I need to store up on some extra sleep before the weekend gets here. Don't forget, if you're not doing anything on Friday night, stop by the high school stadium and say hello. We're expecting a big crowd...and I would love to have you be a part of it.

Dreaming Big,
Doreen

Adjusting...

Day 1 with no hair didn't turn out as bad as I thought it might. I joined the women from work for Taco Tuesday then went up to Mt. Vernon with Cathy to look at wigs, scarves and cute new earrings. The day turned out to be a fun one.

I have so much to share but my head keeps bobbing. I'll write more tomorrow.

Until then, sleep tight..don't let the bed bugs bite.

Love, Dor

Bald is beautiful?

This afternoon I decided to take this whole hair-loss thing into my own hands. So, with the help of the girls and Aunt Vickie... and a pair of clippers.... I made it happen. We took some pictures along the way, so you might see a photo or two of me with a Mohawk one of these days. Check out the funky earrings I'm wearing. A dear old friend, Auntie Lois, brought me a whole bag of fun earrings (the concept is to draw attention away from the bald head...is it working?) Everyone keeps telling me that I have a cute round head but I'm still not completely convinced that the GI Jane look is for me. Regardless, I'm happy that it's over.

Originally, I wanted to turn this whole head-shaving thing into a fundraiser. I thought about inviting people over and letting them take turns cutting my hair (for a small price). I pictured wine, appetizers, and laughter but when the time came it turned into a personal moment. I hope all my friends and family understand my decision to make this private.

I am going to crawl in bed with Ricky and try to rest. I haven't been sleeping much the past few days and my headaches have been annoying. I'm hoping the headaches disappeared with the hair.

Goodnight for now-
Dream Big
Dor

Desert Aire Delight

We've been over at "the Desert" since Thursday and we're having a great time. Angie and Shannon came over on Friday night (it took over 9 hours to get here....Shannon's car had a problem on I-405, they had to get towed, then a rental car, then a 2 hour complete stop on top of the pass)....but they made it here at 11:30 pm.

Today the 4 of us stained the deck at house number 1. Actually Rick and I didn't do much. Thank goodness the girls were here. The sun was really irritating Rick's skin, and too much heat knocks me down. So, without any whining or complaining...they just took control. It looks great!

Tonight we all went to cousin Joe's for a Mexican Fiesta. Our cousin Tom and his girlfriend, Andrea cooked a Mexican dinner all day today and it was fabulous. They bought tortillas fresh off the conveyor belt in Mattawa, bought all the fruits and veggies at the "open market" that is held each weekend in town, made strawberry margaritas (I didn't have one...the thought of alcohol makes me queasy) and played Latin music through dinner. It was great fun until I got a headache and had to go home by 9:00pm.

I woke up this morning to my first pillow full of hair. I've made it through 2 full weeks without losing my hair so I had convinced myself that maybe I wouldn't lose it after all. No such luck. My pillow looked like a small rodent was taking a rest. I woke up early (everyone else was asleep) and sat at the table looking at the pile of hair that had been on my head only hours earlier. Then I cried. I didn't want to wake anyone here, so I sent a photo to my sister in law Vickie who was in Vegas and one to Amy in Seattle. I knew once they got the photo, they would call. They did. Luckily, Susie and Pat (our great neighbors at D.A.) were awake so I spent the morning with them, crying and having coffee. I'm over it now. Hopefully, the majority of my hair will stay in until I get home tomorrow night. I've decided that the best way to deal with it, is to take control. So, sometime this next week...it will get shaved off on my terms. :)

I'm heading back to bed now. My headache is gone and I'm feeling better.

Hope you're having a safe and wonderful Memorial Day Weekend. The weather here is PERFECT!

Love you more,
Dor

We need your help

My dear friend Bonnie Addario and I are tired of lung cancer. Tomorrow morning she is having a 3 foot by 10 foot letter delivered to Oprah regarding this REALLY BIG DISEASE. I'm attaching Bonnie's letter as well as directions to write your own message to Oprah to let her know what you think about Lung Cancer. I know what I want to say...but it contains a few bad words, so instead, I'm going to keep it clean and honest. I hope you'll do the same for me (us).

Here’s the 1-2-3 plan:

The scroll will arrive on Thursday, May 21, 2009

1. Please log on to https://www.oprah.com/plugform.jsp?plugId=220 FIRST THING on Thursday morning and pour your heart and lungs out about WHY you want to see Lung Cancer “talked about” on her show. (You will have 2000 characters).

2. We don’t want to tell you what to write and each email should be different.

3. Just mention that you hope she’s had a chance to read Bonnie J. Addario’s BIG letter.

Please send us a copy of what you wrote…if you want. If not…thank you, in advance, for giving it a go! It’s time for Lung Cancer to hit the airwaves in a BIG way.

Note: If, for any reason, the above link doesn’t take you to the “WE HEAR YOU: OPRAH’s MAIL” page…just go to www.oprah. com…you’ll find it.

Please write to Oprah on Thursday, May 21^st ,and make Lung Cancer the headline it should be every day.

Thank you! Please call Sheila at 415.357.1278 with any questions, and please forward this to anyone you know who will send an email on behalf of eradicating Lung Cancer—and the 450 people dying a day, right here in the U.S

Imagine this on a 3 foot by 10 foot scroll:

Dear Oprah...

I am sending you this really big letter because I need
your help!

I watch your show as often as I can. I am constantly
amazed at how far your voice reaches and the incredible
things you have done for mankind.

Single-handedly you have saved lives and helped elect a
President. You bring issues to the public’s attention that
would not have otherwise been noticed.

I know that if you read in the newspaper or saw on
the news that a Jumbo jet just fell out of the sky you
would be alarmed.

If you read the very next day that another jet fell from
the sky you would sit up and question what was
happening. On day three, you would have Patrick
Forrey on your show and you would be demanding
answers and “guiding us home!”

I know that if you really knew about a disease that
was killing 450 people a day in the U.S. alone and
almost nothing was being done about it, you would do
something. If that disease surpassed breast cancer in
1987 as the biggest cancer killer of women you would
take action. If you heard that this disease received so
little attention and continued to kill people because of
lack of attention and funding, I am sure you would
help us. So, I am convinced you don’ t know.

Oprah...the disease is Lung Cancer and it kills over 1.3
million people worldwide every single year. 60% of the
newly diagnosed cases are people that either never smoked
or quit smoking decades ago...

I am one of the very few, accidental survivors, who live
to tell you. I just reached my 5-year survival
anniversary on March 17, 2009. I am part of a very
small club of survivors and I need your help to increase
the members. I am convinced I am here to make a
difference and God only knows, this was not my plan.

Beverly Sills, Dana Reeve, Peter Jennings, Nat
King Cole, John Wayne, James Whitmore, John
Updike, Suzanne Pleschette, George Harrison, Andy
Kaufman, Walt Disney, Herb Caen, Joe
DiMaggio, to name a few celebs, have all died from
this dreaded disease and no one talks about it. As big
as this letter is, I can’ t name all the people who have
died before their time. Perhaps you know someone near
and dear. I began this foundation the dayDana died
because it needed to happen. Her sister ,Deborah
Morosini, joined our board, immediately, and stands up
with us every day to fight this disease. I am not a
celebrity to anyone other than my beautiful children,
grandchildren, friends and now thousands of followers of
this foundation. I don't have a TV show nor do I have
a movie career where I can rally fans to help me fight
this disease.

All I have is the thought of you....will you help me
bring this jumbo disease to the forefront and get help for
so many people?

With love,
Bonnie Addario

That's it for now. Thanks in advance for your help. We'll keep you posted regarding Oprah's response.

Dreaming Big,
Doreen

One step at a time...

Today marked a very different kind of day for Rick and I. We've been "dealing" with cancer in our lives for over 3 years, but to be honest we haven't done much "preparing". Not preparing to die, but rather to take care of some things so we can just keep "living". This afternoon, Rick and I met with our friend Dave, a funeral director. We met him at the cemetery where Rick's mom is buried and we picked out our...final vacation home.... It is a beautiful spot, close to home, with a view :) In a good neighborhood. There is a kind of freedom that comes with preparing for death. I'm a firm believer when you're really prepared for something...it won't happen like you thought. For instance, buy flood insurance and you're guaranteed to be safe from a flood. Don't buy it, and the dike breaks in your backyard. Buy an extra pair of pantyhose for a special occasion just in case you run the first pair...you won't have a run. Don't buy an extra pair and your fingernail pokes through the leg as you're putting them on. So, we bought cemetery plots today as an early 50th wedding anniversary present. We don't intend to use them until after our party (20 years from now).

Truthfully, when I told the kids what we were doing I thought they might be sad and think that we were premature in our purchase. Instead, they were the amazing kids I new they would be and said "Good for you, take control. Get what you want." Eventually, Rick or I would have to make the decision anyway so why not do it together?

I'm feeling much better this week in terms of queasiness. I do, however, need to get some rest. Hopefully tonight I'll have a little more success than last night.

Rick has chemo tomorrow morning and I'm going to take him. Originally, I thought we should make arrangements for someone to take him in case I wasn't feeling well. But, as you all know...I'm feeling great. We have to be on the road by 6:30am so I'd better get to bed.

Dreaming Big,
Doreen

Counting Sheep

Oh my goodness. It's 3:00am and I'm wide awake (just as I have been since I laid down at 11:00pm). I've watched all my TIVO'd shows, loaded and started the dishwasher, read a magazine (from front to the back, including advertisement pages), had a cup of tea (no caffeine), checked my e-mail and the list goes on. Since this new chemo, my body seems to never shut down. Don't get me wrong, I'm in no hurry for my body to "SHUT DOWN", but I wouldn't mind if it went in to sleep mode every evening.

I think my hair is having a calm before the "storm". For the past 4 days I've had a "good hair day" so I'm wondering if that's what happens right before it decides to fall out? Oh well, I guess after it's gone, all my days will be "good hair days".

I had a wonderful day today (Sunday). This morning Rick and I met my parents for breakfast, then I spent the afternoon (and early evening) with my sister in law, Vickie. We went to a movie, stopped at a few stores (where we found some great gifts ~ for ourselves), laughed and cried. We only live about 5 minutes apart from one another and we still don't get together often enough.

Jake came to the house today for a few hours and helped Rick run the weed eater and other odd jobs around the property that I knew he wanted to get done. It's not that Rick can't accomplish those tasks on his own, but having Jake here to help out saves him hours of strenuous work. When Rick works that hard anymore he's worn out for days and I don't think his body appreciates it :( Thanks Bud for helping out when you can (even when the Lakers and the Red Sox are on TV - I know that was a big sacrifice)

I've decided to put my Ipod on with some headphones, pick my favorite play list and crawl back into bed. Maybe my favorite music can help me get the shut eye I need.

Hugs and Kisses (I thought using the Dreaming Big line was a bit of a stretch since dreaming takes place while you're SLEEPING)
Doreen

Saturday Night Barn Dance

We just got home after a really fun evening at the "Raise the Roof, Relay Barn Dance & Auction". Lots of people, fabulous time, more laughs than you can imagine. The kids (minus Jake and Megan ~ they were at a Fleetwood Mac concert), my parents, and a bunch of friends joined us for the event. Hopefully this will be an annual occasion.

You all know the story of Angie and Shannon's bowling shirts...well tonight wasn't a whole lot different. Today they went shopping at Value Village (again) and bought Hoe-Down outfits. I'm attaching a photo because an explanation would not be sufficient. Angie doesn't make it a habit to wear a dress, so you can imagine our hysteria when she and Shannon entered the party tonight dressed like "cowgirls". I'm still laughing out loud at the way they looked. What good sports they were.

Before we left the house tonight, Amy looked at me with really sweet eyes and said, "mom, you look so good tonight, people are going to say they want what you have". I assured her they wouldn't be wishing lung cancer on themselves and thanked her for the compliment. I think it just might have been the color pink I was wearing or maybe the tan I still have from Palm Springs. I'm attaching a photo of Rick and I so you can judge for yourself.

Someone wrote on the comments yesterday that they had a recipe for hard candy to help with mouth sores...I'd like to get a copy of that if you wouldn't mind sharing. Thanks in advance.

Since we have a big lawn and lots of weeds and today was over 70 degrees, Rick and I decided to work in the yard. Thanks to my neighbor Lynell stopping by, we now have less weeds than we did yesterday. L, you're the best.

Dreaming Big with a smile on my face,
Dor

Fabulous Friday

Whenever I get to see all my kids in the same day, it's bound to be a good one. Today was no exception.

I woke up early again (one of the side effects to chemo...I don't sleep in like usual) and decided to get moving sooner than normal. I showered, made breakfast then headed to Marysville to take care of some unfinished business. I returned home around 1:00 and I was BEAT. Luckily, I took a little snooze and was back in business this evening. Amy, Rick and I went over to the fairgrounds to help out with the Hoe-Down. We didn't do much, but we had fun trying.

This afternoon, I started to get tingling in my fingers and a couple of sores in my mouth. I'm hoping this isn't the beginning of a rough 2nd week. If it is however, I'll learn to suck it up. I've had 3 pretty great years fighting this battle, I guess a few side effects won't hurt me.

I'm very tired tonight, so I'm heading to bed. Hopefully, I'll have some photos to post tomorrow night when we return from "Raising the Roof".

Keep DREAMING BIG,
Dor

Wow

Best damned Grey's Anatomy I've ever seen. However, if I ever see Izzie or George in an elevator, I'm going to run the other way.

That's it. I just thought I'd share :)

Dor

Birthday Thursday

Although my spirits are up, I've sort of been waiting for the hammer to drop when it comes to bad chemo days. Well today came and went (along with the last 2 days) and it hasn't been too bad. I did have a massage today and even though it was very nice, I think it worked out the toxins in my body. So, this afternoon, I was feeling the aftermath of a headache.

I've been looking forward to this afternoon because the ladies from work were meeting in Mt. Vernon to celebrate Sheryl (my replacement at work) and my birthday (they are both on the same day just 5 years apart). Janeen picked me up (even with a little headache remaining) and we scooted off to have some fun. Now that I'm home, and the headache is nearly gone, I'm so glad I went. Sometimes cancer can get the best of us and to be honest, I'm sick of it taking my fun away.

This weekend is our Relay Barn Dance (not a lot different than the hoe-down I just attended in California) but rather than celebrate a birthday, we'll be raising the money and the ROOF.

Tonight is a big TV night...I know I need to get a life. Grey's Anatomy is going to be a good one and I'm hoping they vote "Coach" off on Survivor. Other than that, I'm hoping for a good night's rest and a healthy day again tomorrow.

Dreaming Big,
Dor

So far...so good

Besides feeling fatigued and a little queasy, I had a good day yesterday. My mom and dad came to the house to "babysit" me just in case the day didn't go as I had planned. Thanks for all the help, you're the best! I've been encouraged to take the anti-nausea meds and steroids whether I think I need them or not for the first few days. They say it's easier to stay on top of the nausea rather than try to fix it later.

I woke up at exactly 5:30am (today) just when my next meds were due. I have an odd taste in my mouth this morning and I'm already feeling a little queasy again. Let's hope today goes as well as yesterday.

I promise to write more later. I just wanted to give you a little update so you knew things were going well.

Dreaming Big,
Dor

New Beginnings

I just returned home from my parent's house where I was cuddling in bed with my mom after her first day of this new chemo drug. She was so exhausted and filled with chemo drugs that she often said things that did not make sense. I felt so sad for her that I just squeezed her tighter and told her how great she was. It took everything I had to crawl out of that bed and drive home. I hated leaving her.

My mom had to be in Seattle at 8:30 am this morning and they left Seattle this evening around 7:00 pm. It was a very long day of treatment but she was in good company. Dad and my Aunt Vickie were Mom's caregivers today, not to mention visits from Amy and Megan at SCCA throughout the afternoon. Thank you Vickie for the love you showed Mom all day.

Mom received anti-nausea medication today that is supposed to last between 24 and 48 hours. Her doctor told us that the first three days will be the hardest for her and recommended that she have few interruptions and get a lot of sleep. Because of this, we are asking that everyone send supportive e-mails rather than calling the house for the first few days. We promise to bring the laptop to Mom and read her all of your messages when she is feeling up to it. By Thursday the doctor said she should begin feeling better. You'll all know when she is feeling better and ready to chat because you can't keep her off the phone for long!

With this new round of treatment comes some new side effects. As we previously mentioned, Mom will be losing her hair sometime between now and the next couple of weeks and she will have a compromised Immune System. Next week should be the time when her white count is the lowest, therefore causing a bigger threat to get sick. If you come to visit Mom over the next few weeks you can find hand sanitizer, face masks and just about anything else that you might need in the basket next to the front door. Thanks for helping us make this a priority!

As for those of you wondering if my parents need dinners to be made and delivered to them...no, not at this time. We have dinner covered for the next three days and will see what they are craving after that. We appreciate the offerings however.

I attached a photo that was taken yesterday at my house for Mother's Day. Looks like a pretty happy gang if you ask me... :)

Dreaming Bigger than ever-

Angie

Happy Mother's Day

It's 6:00am and I'm starting to wake up to get ready to come home, After a fabulous week in San Carlos, it's time for me to say my goodbyes and head back to Washington to my wonderful family (who I think might be missing me as much as I'm missing them). I know it's going to be an emotional morning...it always is when I have to say goodbye to the Addario gang.

Danielle's (Bonnie's daughter) surprise 40th birthday party hoedown last night was so fun. Andrea (Bonnie's other daughter) wanted to throw the party of the year, and I think she did it! Their friends, the food and band were all amazing. I'm really glad I stayed for the event....except when I had to say good bye to the kids last night :( It was suppose to be a happy night and I put a little wrench in that when I gave all my kisses and hugs).

Amy is picking me up at the airport this morning and we're all meeting at Angie's this evening for a barbecue. I can't wait to kiss and hug the faces of my clan. Even though I've had a wonderful time here in California, I have missed them all so much. What a better day than Mother's Day to return home. :)

I could not have picked a better time to come down here. My week was so full of stuff to do that I was able to put my new chemo adventure to the back of my brain and not worry about it.

Happy Mother's Day to all you incredible moms. Sit back and let your family spoil you, YOU'RE WORTH IT!

Keep Dreaming Big,
Doreen

Brain Overload

This week has been filled (to the brim) with more information than I'd ever imagined I could comprehend.  Today we had another doctor's appointment.  This time it was with the lung transplant doctor.  He was pretty amazing.  From the time he walked into the exam room until the time he left, he talked.  He told us everything we could possibly need to know about transplants.  I will tell you that if I ever decide to have a transplant, he will definitely be the doctor who does it.  Smart, informative, brilliant.

This morning before we went to the appointment, Carol Lin from the Lungtube interviewed me again.  Then, Bonnie and I were videotaped in the car on the way to the city.  I guess there will be a 4th "webisode" for your viewing pleasure.  

Last night we went out for dinner with a friend of Bonnie's (Deb Flannigan - Flannie as she likes to be called).  My tummy is still hurting from all the laughter.  I swear, when I get home I'm going to need to rest from all the excitement I've had.

I'm missing my family (though Bonnie and Tony are doing their best to make me feel at home).  I get home on Sunday (Mother's Day) and we're going to celebrate at Angie's.

I'll write more later, but dinner is just about ready so I'd better go help set the table.

Keep dreaming big,

Doreen

Peaceful Cinco De Mayo

I had another great day in California with Bonnie. We slept in, drank coffee and talked all morning about how we were going to save the "world". After showers and breakfast we went into the town of San Carlos, shopped around had a pleasant lunch then headed home to get ready for our .evening.

Tonight, Bonnie, Tony and I attending a dinner party with about 150 research scientists, who are working on early detection for lung, prostrate, ovarian and pancreatic cancers. It was an amazing event to attend. They have studies in the works where dogs walk around people and smell their breath. If something is wrong with the person, the dog lays down on the person's feet. Lots of evidence...it's just incredible.

I learned this afternoon before we left, that I might have another appointment in the city tomorrow with the pumonlogist then again on Thursday with the transplant team. I can not believe my time here with Bonnie and her family is almost over.

Tomorrow is Bella (Andrea's daughter) 7th birthday. They're having a big party with a bouncy house and lots of goodies. I can't wait for the fun.

I'm heading off to bed... Goodnight sleep tight, don't let the bedbugs bite.

Dreaming Big,
Doreen

Dr. Appointment Update

Today was a long, but great day. I learned some really important things regarding my last PET scan, the potential for a transplant and some unknown factors.

We met Dr. Jablons around 8:00 and he discussed the possibility of a transplant. Before I could ever be put on a list, I need to exhaust all my options. Chemo, chemo and more chemo if that's what it takes. I learned that I would not need to live in California before the transplant. There would be time for me to fly down because the patient whose lungs I might receive would not be taken off life support until I arrived in California. All of this brings some comfort to my heart, but I still don't know if this procedure is for me.

I met Dr. Jahan (oncologist) after my first appointment. What a great doc. Funny sense of humor and a very smart man. At first he thought the chemo protocol I've chosen to do would not suit me as well as another combination might. Then he reviewed my PET scan and said my lungs, lymph nodes and ovary all look "hot" and active. The research trial actually scans me frequently so we'll know sooner rather than later if this new drug is working.

Ok, enough about stupid cancer. Tonight Bonnie, her girls and I went out for dinner at the Irongate (not the Lionsgate). Oh my goodness. The food was the best I've ever had. Honestly!
My stomach is still hurting from all laughing we did. As I sat with her and her daughter's tonight I truly felt like I was with family. I really love these people.

Ok, it's getting late and I didn't sleep well at all last night. A little too anxious. Tonight, I'm going to sleep like a baby.

Keep Dreaming Big,
Dor

I finally made it!

After waiting in the airport for an extra hour and a half, I finally made it to San Francisco (actually Bonnie lives in San Carlos, just outside the city). Her kids all came by tonight and we visited around the pool and the outside fireplace. I feel like I'm sitting in the middle of Italy.

We've got an early morning tomorrow. I have to be in the city for my appointment by 8:00 so we're leaving at 6:45. Bonnie is so excited that I'm here to be evaluated by her "team". I'm so grateful to her (and Sheila) for making this happen.

We have something planned everyday that I'm here. Tomorrow night is girls night at the Lionsgate. I'm not sure what that means, but when one of the girls suggested it...they all got excited...so I'll let you know tomorrow how it went. :)

I'm attaching a few photos from our evening. The one photo is Andrea, Bonnie, Danielle and I. The other photo is my princess bed. I'm in my own little castle here. Only one little problem...I'm missing my Prince Charming.

Dreaming Big,

Dor

Happy May Day!

Scan results came in today and they were not what I had hoped for. The cancer has not spread to other areas of my body, but the lungs are continuing to worsen and the lymph nodes between my lungs are getting larger. One of the nodes appears to be more aggressive than the others. I'm not surprised by the results because it's been almost a month since I've had any kind of treatment. Once I return from San Francisco, we'll get something going...and I'll work on kicking this cancer's BUTT.

The whole family got together tonight and we went out for dinner to Jimmy's Pizza and Pasta (one of the family's favs). At dinner we celebrated Shannon getting a great new job then after dinner we celebrated our friend Ann returning home from Iraq. We all had a great time, but the evening got away with us and we didn't get home until midnight. Now it's 1:30 and I'm having trouble sleeping so I thought I'd get on line and share my thoughts with you.

Tomorrow (today actually) is Nick Whiton's funeral (celebration of life). I'm sure it will be a very emotional day but I'm looking forward to putting my arms around Larry and giving him a hug he won't forget. I'm still struggling with how unfair Nick's passing was. He was so young, with young children, loved by so many and had lots of unfinished business. Why don't we have a cure for this disease?

I'd better get to sleep. It's going to be a very long day tomorrow.

Dream Big,
Dor

Change of Plans

This afternoon I got a call from the doctor's office in San Francisco. They said they would see me at 8:00am on Monday morning. Oops, small problem. I don't leave Seattle until 9:30 on Monday morning. Everything turned out ok....I got a call from Bonnie and Sheila and they've made new arrangements for me. I'll now be leaving on Sunday afternoon, returning on Mother's Day morning. Besides my appointments, I really can't wait to get to San Francisco and be a part of the Bonnie J. Addario Lung Cancer Foundation. It is an amazing group of people working hard to help save the lives of people like me.

I visited with my friend Ann for 5 hours this morning/afternoon. She was gone for 95 days in Iraq and we had lots to catch up on. It's great to have her home~SAFELY.

We had a beautiful day in Washington today. It gave me an opportunity to wash my SUV (which also wore me out...but it was worth it). I love a clean automobile :)

Love you more than all the tulips that are finally blooming in Skagit County.

Big Dreamer Dor

Pet Scan

Thanks to Shannon, I had an HOV buddy and a pal to hang around with all day before and after my PET scan. She was also a stand in photographer/videographer for the next set of webisodes. So, now that the scan is over, we just wait. When I learn something...so will you.

I'm getting ready to head to California on Monday to start a great week with Bonnie, her team of docs, and a visit with her family. I'm looking forward to my time with the gang from San Francisco.

Thanks kids for all your help today. Without your love and hardwork...I'm not sure how Dad and I could do it around here. (That goes for you too Shannon and Mel...2 more kids never hurt any family...ours is better because you're in it)

Tomorrow I'm going to visit with my friend Ann, who has just returned from Iraq after 4 months. Although she kept us up on what life was like via e-mail, I'm looking forward to seeing her in person. I'm so proud of her service for our freedom.

It was an early morning, so I'd better call it a night.

Sleep tight and Dream BIG,
Dor

Taco Tuesday

I had a great lunch today with the ladies from work. We haven't gotten together in a long time. Well, they always go to lunch on Tuesday....I'm just not always there. (Chemo Tuesday/Friday routine got in the way).

Tomorrow is my PET/CT scan so I had a routine to follow today to prepare my body for the test. Low carbs, lots of water, no exercise or heavy lifting, nothing after 8:00pm. As with any restrictions, now that I know I can't have anything....I'm hungry for a snack! I'm going to go get a nice big glass of water and fill my tummy.

Thanks to all of you who've watched the Lungtube. Your comments and e-mails are very touching. So glad you've all enjoyed it.

I'd better get to bed. I've gotta get up at 5:45am tomorrow. Ugh!

Keep dreaming big,
Dor

Miscellaneous Monday

This morning I woke up to my friend Kelly who stopped by after she dropped her son off at school. We sat and talked for a few hours since it had been forever since our last visit. What a nice way to start the morning.

I'm sorry to say that my friend, Larry's son in law, Nick passed away yesterday morning. He was 38 years young with a wonderful family and friends who will surely miss him. Please keep them in your thoughts and prayers.

Here is the link to the webisodes...www.LungTube.tv To get to our story, click Love and Lung Cancer. I'm humbled by the story Carol Lin has put together. Check out all the links. There are some amazing stories.

Here is a little memo from Amy regarding Relay:

Currently we have two "Doreen's Dream team" relay teams signed up. We are allowed to have 15 people per team. We set up the second team when we got to 16 people but that is where we have stood... 16 people... for quite some time. The relay will be here before we know it (34 days to be exact) so we either need to get the teams filled up or drop the second team. I always look forward to seeing all of my favorite women in the same place at the same time so I would love for you to get signed up again this year. Please don't let the fear of fundraising be a factor for you. Our team is about raising awareness first, and money second. Please click on the link below to sign up for the team. http://main.acsevents.org/site/TR/RelayForLife/RFLFY09GW?pg=personal&fr_id=14556&fr_id=14556&px=4014571

I've been feeling kind of cruddy this afternoon. Nothing in particular, just not myself. I think I'm going to call it a night and get my jammies on early.

Dreaming Big,

Dor

Saturday's Scoop

Today in the mail I got my itinerary for my next visits to SCCA. On Wednesday, I'll have a PET/CT scan, then on Monday the 11th, I'll start my new chemo regime. I'm hoping the information I learn from the docs in San Francisco won't be too much of a conflict from what my oncologist in Seattle has scheduled. I'll keep you posted on how it all works out.

We started the morning kind of laid back (like most days) then Rick went to work and I did a few things around the house while I was watching the NFL draft. Tonight, Dave and Val picked us up and we went to a Relay for Life fundraiser auction. We had a nice time and got some great items. After the event was over, the 4 of us went out for dinner and talked about how much fun we had last week in Palm Springs. We've all agreed that it's a trip we'd like to take again...maybe every April?

Amy and Melana went to Desert Aire this weekend for some peace and quiet (and they both have studying to do....Mel for her work and Amy for the Air Force). Before they started studying Mel painted the front door to Desert Aire house #1 a beautiful dark red while Amy mowed and weedeated the yard. It's so nice to have the kids volunteer to help with the upkeep. Maintaining 3 houses can be a lot of work. We need to get house #1 sold so we have a little more time to just enjoy ourselves when we spend time over there.

The webisodes I've been working on for Bonnie's website are now up and running. I'll attach a link to the sight tomorrow. In the meantime, you can get on the Bonnie J. Addario Lung Cancer Foundation website: bjalcf.org and look around for it. Our story is under the Lung Tube site, and it's called Love and Cancer. I know the story and I still cried when I watched it.

I hope you get a little rest and relaxation tomorrow before you head back to work. R & R is always good for the soul.

Dream Big and Laugh Out Loud,
Dor

Sadness strikes again

This morning I woke up to a phone call from my dear friend (and 2nd dad) Larry. His family is going through a really tough time right now as his son in law is losing his very short battle with gallbladder cancer. There is nothing I wouldn't do for Larry and his family, but I also know there is nothing I can do right now to help them through this tough time. I spent the better part of my morning thinking of Larry's daughter and her young children and the hard times they'll soon be facing. I also couldn't help but feel survivor's guilt. Here I am 3 years after my diagnosis and not much has been altered in my life. Please keep their family in your thoughts and prayers....they could use a little extra right now.

This afternoon while I was cutting Angie hair, Jake taught Shannon how to use the riding lawn mower and she turned into a farmer. We looked outside and she had put on a flannel shirt and a Wolfkill hat. It was hilarious to watch...I took photos but I can't seem to get them to download. I'll keep working on it.

Rick and I went to our first Relay for Life fundraiser this weekend, a spaghetti feed. We've got another event tomorrow evening, silent auction, then a breakfast on Sunday morning at the Duck Inn. It brings us pleasure to participate in other people's fundraisers because all the proceeds go to the same great cause.

We're both feeling really good this week. I think the trip to Palm Springs was just what the doctor ordered.

Tonight I skyped with my friends Steve and Toni in Boise. It feels like we're in the same room chatting with one another. If you aren't a Skyper yet, you should try it out.

Time to head to bed. I haven't been sleeping well lately and I could use a little extra beauty sleep.

Dreaming Big,
Dor

Research Study

Amy spent the night at our house last night so we could get up "really" early. We didn't want to be late for our 7:40am appointment (hence, the wake up time at 5:30am). After all the showers were taken, we were dressed and loading into the car, I "double-checked" our start time which was actually not until 8:40am....oops! We ended up being a little early but we actually hit traffic so my goof up worked out perfectly. Thanks for being another set of ears today, Amy.

After meeting with Dr. Eaton today, I realized how lucky I had been considering I have been able to avoid "standard" chemo for the past 3 years. The week following Mother's Day I will begin a research study (the drugs are standard) but the tests they do to see how the drugs are working are different. The drugs used in this study are Taxol and Carboplatin. They are chemo drugs that have been around for a long time. They have some ugly side effects (but new meds have been developed to make the side effects milder). I will lose my hair (but by the time we start the treatment I'll probably be needing a new haircut anyway).

Today was the first day I didn't feel afraid of the unknown when it came to chemo treatments. I just want a plan and now we have one. Actually, we have 3 plans (2 others that we'll try if this first one doesn't work). I'm a little anxious about the nausea and low blood counts, but I'm going to do my best to stay as healthy as possible.

Rick's chemo went as planned. He's laying down right now taking a little nap before dinner. I think I'll go join him. A nap never hurt anyone.

Dreaming Big,
Dor

We're Home, Happy and Rested

I could go on for weeks about the fun we had only I don't have enough time. I will assure you however, that this will not be the only time the 6 of us go to Palm Springs in the April.

As much as I want to ramble on about the trip, I need to get to bed. Rick has chemo in the morning and we have to get up at 5:30am. Amy and I will be meeting with Dr. Eaton about my scan results and what our next plan of attack might be. You'll hear from me tomorrow after these appointments, I promise.

I'm adding some photos from my camera. None of them will include a bathing suit (those are the only ones Bob sent Angie on his cell phone). The first photo is of my new haircut. I love it. The next photo was the 6 of us at a show in a Casino. Shortly after the show was over we were all given $10.00 of Casino money to play with and I won $66.60. Yahoo. The next photo is the 6 of us playing putt putt golf. I won't mention the cheating, but the game was a lot closer than 13 strokes. And lastly, we stopped at the Cancer Survivor's Park in Palm Springs last night before dinner and this is Rick and I being a part of the sculpture.

I've missed you all,
Dor

Sunday Vacation Update

This is Angie, giving you an update on my parent's vacation. Mom called me early this evening to tell me all about their weekend. She told me that they don't have easy access to the internet and wanted me to make sure the blog was "up-to-date." Mom spoke quickly and told story, after story, after story about the great experiences that they are having with their dear friends.

Mom informed me that the weather has been in the 90's, they are getting a nice tan (except for dad who is supposed to stay out of the sunshine because of the medication that he is on) and that they just cant bring themselves to get out of the pool! She said that they had dinner reservation at a fabulous restaurant that was at a high elevation on Saturday night and that she worried all day about how her lungs would tolerate it. It ended up being a great meal and she did not suffer from any breathing problems. Mom said the evening was a blast and it ended with mom getting "tipsy" and feeling a little silly. Sounds like fun to me!!

Today the six of them played a very competitive game of miniature golf which ended with the guys beating the girls by 13 strokes. Mom is pretty sure they cheated...but said they enjoyed themselves anyway. Tonight they planned to stay in and cool off after a hot day of playing around. She did not tell me what their plans are for tomorrow but she did mention something about driving go-carts or something before they come home. Mom always told us kids that she wanted to be a race car driver so my money is on her!

Consider yourselves "up-to-date" by Dor.

Dreaming Big,
Angie

Thursday Update

Unfortunately this is still Amy. It is not looking promising that my parents will have Internet access anytime soon. That means that mom will call one of us with information and then we will update all of you. So far today we have gotten a copy of the written scan results. They consist of 4 pages of "doctor language" but I will give you the plain talk version. There is increased airspace around some lesions in the lung which could represent a developing superimposed infection or hemorrhaging. With all of her coughing lately, none of us would be surprised if she has begun to hemorrhage. Also, there is minimal progression in the number of lesions from her last scan and definite interval increase in size and number of lesions compared to her January 2009 scan.

Mom was pretty emotional this morning when she called. It's hard to hear her crying. When she's not getting enough oxygen it only leads to more coughing. Her tears this morning started when she told me about her nurse that called just to say hello and see if there was anything she could do to help. My mom couldn't get over how wonderful her nursing staff has been during these rough days. She knows that she is loved and she is just as positive as ever. She knows that her body will be going thru some changes soon and that makes her sad, but she knows that it is her next step.

Again, she has asked me to thank everyone for the well wishes and then said, "No more tears... I'm headed to the pool". Good for her-

Amy

Bad News

Just four days short of Dor's three year anniversary with cancer she got the bad news we have been dreading. Her cancer has progressed and they will be taking her off of the clinical trial. I didn't get a lot of info but it sounds like her right lung is worse as are some lymph nodes. She got the phone call this afternoon shortly after arriving in Palm Springs for their much needed vacation.

Mom and Dad shared the news with us and then said we will talk about everything later. They want to ejoy the trip and deal with reality when they get home. Dr. Eaton told mom the same thing. He told her to have fun and that they will discuss her next treatment options when she gets home.

Mom doesn't have internet access tonight so she asked me to thank everyone for the prayers and good thoughts. Mom hopes to be online tomorrow to fill everyone in on the details.

For now we are just taking one day at a time.

Dreaming Big-
Amy

Anniversary Eve

Tonight, Vickie and Tom took us out for dinner to celebrate our anniversary. Tomorrow (our actual anniversary date) I have a haircut (to get ready for our vacation) and a scan (to make sure the clinical trial is still working) then back home to celebrate with my honey. We don't have anything special planned, but I'm sure we do lots of fun things once we get to Palm Springs. I'm thinking "a mud bath", or a trip to some "hot springs"...

I'm really looking forward to warm weather, a good book, and great friends. We've been counting down this trip since we booked it 3 months ago. Bob and Dy send weekly reminder text messages (like we've forgotten) to make sure we're ready to go!

Rick and I have been feeling pretty good. I've been sleeping terrible lately, so last night I used my meditation to get me to sleep and it worked. Or so I think...I was asleep right before I woke up this morning ~ that was the indicator that the meditation is working.

Vickie took a photo of Rick and I at dinner tonight. I thought it was pretty cute (even with us in it) so I've decided to share it with all of you.

Sweet dreams,

Doreen

Happy Easter!

I asked Pam to call and wake me up this morning to go to church with her. Apparently she called. It appears I talked to her. But somehow there was a miscommunication. I went back to bed and she waited for me at the Bank of America. Oops. She stopped by afterwards and told me what I'd missed. She also brought me flowers (even though she was still mad at me for standing her up).

I had the kids and my parents all over for brunch this morning. I was going to get up early and hide the eggs, but you all know the story of their fear of Easter Eggs. I promised I wasn't going to bring it up again so that's all I'm going to say.

I made the kids favorite breakfast/brunch meal. Eggs Benedict on croissants, fruit and mimosas. Megan brought some homemade raspberry crumble muffins to add to the meal. It was a wonderful morning.

The kids bought us a locking mailbox for our anniversary and gave it to us today. It will be nice for us to not worry about getting our mail picked up on days we're gone. I think Rick and my dad are going to install it before we leave for Palm Springs.

While we were laughing all morning (some of the laughter came from lack of sleep) my dad had his camera out. I'm going to add some photos of my crazy family.

Whenever we get together for any kind of photo shoot, one of my kids always says "hey we should do a pyramid". We laugh every time we hear it...like it's some new idea, but today Amy, Angie, Shannon and Mel did it for us. Jake and Megan had already left or I'm sure they would have been in on the fun as well.

I've added a photo of my mom and dad since they were looking like love birds.

Rick thought he was just having a nice photo taken with his daughters, but they thought he looked better as a rabbit....

Easter always feels like a new beginning, so enjoy the rest of your day...and start fresh tomorrow.

Dreaming Big,

Doreen

The Waiting Game

When I woke up this morning, the first thing on my mind was my CT scan on Tuesday. I dread waiting for it, then waiting for the results. I've discovered that WAITING has really become a bother to me. After a little daily meditation and careful thought, I realized...waiting is nothing more than a word.

When I sat in line behind 2 cars and WAITED for my tall, non-fat, no whip, extra hot, 1 pump peppermint, mocha this morning, it didn't bother be. As a matter of fact, I didn't mind the wait. Then, I went to the bank to make a deposit and WAITED behind 3 people who were also doing their weekend business and I thought, this wait isn't bad (and how lucky we are that we have money to deposit). Wait #2, painless. I just put dinner in the oven and it should be done in about 30 minutes. Again, a WAIT without grief. When my wait is over, we'll have full tummies and the peace of mind that we are able to have food on our table.

I know each time I have a scan that I'll have to wait for something. The truth is... I'm always waiting for the same thing. It shouldn't hurt. I doesn't hurt. The results might sting a bit if they don't turn out like I'd hoped but then we just go on to a new plan.

I'm taking the power out of the word WAIT. Think of all the joyous things we get out of waiting; babies and puppies, airplane and ferry rides, heating up the BBQ. Each of these things gives us something to look forward to. A future, a vacation, a good meal.

Now that doesn't mean I'm not still a little anxious about test results, but I'm hoping after this little talk I've had with myself that I will be able to let go of the unknown and patiently wait for whatever comes my way.

Feeling better every day and looking forward to our little vacation in the sun with Bob, Dy, Dave and Val.

Dreaming Big,
Doreen

Great day with the Titus Girls

This morning I was greeted by my 2 cleaning ladies. The house is sparkly and clean and I'm ready to start my next week with a beautiful house. I could get used to this pampering.

Once the cleaning crew left, the Titus girls picked me up and we left for Seattle for the day. We started the day at Dick's drive in for lunch, then checked in at our hotel. By 2:20 we were at Pike Place having the best day ever. We couldn't have asked for better weather...the sun was shining all afternoon.

Tomorrow morning they'll be accompanying me to my chemo appointment and we're sure to have fun there as well. The staff can't wait to meet my friends (only this time I'm bringing 4 of them with me at once)

I'm attaching a photo of the 5 of us at the market.

Keep dreaming big,
Dor

Long, Long, Day at Chemo

Today's chemo appointments lasted from 7:30am to 6:15pm. Everything went well just the timing was a little spread out.

I took advantage of the beautiful weather and after my chemo (while Rick stayed back at SCCA waiting for his chemo to start) I rode the new trolley system to downtown Seattle. It was beautiful. I bought a couple of gifts, walked to Pike Place Market to get some fresh flowers (but they were only selling daffodils and I can get fresh ones right where I live) then headed back to meet up with Rick in infusion. I got a couple of warm blankets for him, then a couple for me, wrapped myself up in the reclining chair and woke up when Rick's chemo was complete.

We stopped for dinner on the way home. We immediately crawled into bed and are just about to fall asleep so I 'd better say goodnight.

Dreaming Big,
Dor

Meditation Monday

I was pleasantly surprised to wake up to such beautiful weather again today. My day was filled with visitors, first my friend Kim, next came Jake, then my sister in law Denise and great niece Shailee. My company lasted until about 3:30 – 4:00 when I got ready to go to my first MEDITATION class. I met Janeen and we both really enjoyed it. What an easy way to calm your body, soul and mind.

After class, I arrived home to a houseful of March Madness Maniacs. (They were not really maniacs but that sounded better than March Madness watchers). Sarah Schmenauer brought dinner over (that her mom had prepared) then stayed to watch the game and have dinner with us. What a houseful we had. Jake, Angie, Amy, Rick, Shannon, Mel, Sarah and me (Megan had a late night so she couldn't join us). If you didn’t have your TV on, North Carolina won. So did Shannon in some pool she was in. Luckily it was in Oregon, or Amy would have confiscated all the money and called it illegal. Ok, maybe not, but she would have teased her about it.

It’s chemo again for Rick and I tomorrow so after our houseful of people left, we headed down to Seattle for our early morning appointments. It’s so much nicer to wake up 10 minutes from our destination than fight the early morning Seattle traffic. Thanks Mel for making our life a little easier.

April is a busy month for us. Today is my nephew Jason’s birthday, my niece Darlena’s birthday is coming up fast, our anniversary, Jake’s birthday, Palm Springs vacation, Easter, tax day, & CT scans. With all this excitement…we’re bound to have some great days ahead.

It’s getting late, so I’d better call it a night. Rick and I have been feeling pretty good lately. Finally healing from the RSV and upper respitory infections. We've got friends to play with on vacation. We need to get better FAST!

I’ll write more tomorrow if I’m not asleep all afternoon.

Dream Big,
Doreen

All is Well

For those of you who are having withdrawls from reading the daily blog, sorry about that. I have been too busy living (and loving) life to write a blog. On Friday I had chemo and it went well. I no longer have RSV so I am safe to hold your babies and kiss the elderly.... or something like that. :)

After chemo Rick and I drove over to Desert Aire for a wonderful weekend. We were delayed for 30 minutes on the way over the pass due to avalanche control. Internet is touchy over there so even if I had stopped having fun long enough to write a blog... there is no guarantee I would have had any service. I didn't want to risk wasting time so I enjoyed life with my Ricky instead. We watched a movie and spent a little while touching up the white paint on the other house (which is still for sale). We had a few people stop to look at the house this weekend but still no offers. If you or someone you know is looking for a vacation house with a view and awesome neighbors (that would be us) please let us know. They won't be disappointed in this darling place.

We enjoyed the beautiful weather all weekend and had a wonderful time visiting with our friends and family. Our plan was to leave around noon and head back across the pass but those plans were quickly changed when we heard about the new avalanche issues. Snoqualmie pass was shut down for hours and when it finally opened, the back-up was over 18 miles long. It re-opened with only one lane moving westbound. We heard the news and decided it was a sign that we were meant to stay a little longer in our "paradise" and avoid the mess on the road. We did exactly that (thanks to a few phone calls and updates from our friends who were stuck in it).

We are looking forward to a great week at home. I'm hoping to have all of the kids over tomorrow night for the NCAA championship game and a yummy dinner. I hope all of you had as wonderful of a weekend as Rick and I.

Rested and Loved-
Dor

Webisode Mania

Today I was determined to work on some episodes for Bonnie's website. Tonight I'm going to attach a little snippet of what's to come. Bonnie has some amazing people working on this project so it's bound to turn out spectacular.

Here's the problem. Me. My job is to get on my web cam and talk. You would think this would be a simple job for "she never shuts up" Doreen but today I couldn't make it happen. Cathy came by and helped me set the "stage" for my background. We laughed so hard just trying to figure that out, that I'm surprised I got anything done. Luckily, Amy came by the house and with her infinite wisdom just said...don't make this so hard. Be yourself. Follow their directions. Gosh she's smart. I actually accomplished a lot more than I had imagined.

Just so you know, I'm not sure if webisode is even a word, I just use it to explain that I'm doing an episode of something on the web.

It is apparent by last night's photo that Angie and Shannon brought home the trophy. All the bowlers and Rick and I went to dinner tonight. Rick asked where the trophy was (assuming that someone might bring it along just to rub it in) and Angie answered with, "we're having it polished" or some smarty pants answer like that. Janeen said she would be my bowling buddy the next time they go....I can't wait! That trophy is coming home with us....

Here is the link to a "taste" of the Lungtube.....We hope you enjoy it. There's a lot more to come! http://www.mercury-inc.com/downloads/lungtube_teaser.mov

Gotta say goodnight. It's getting late and I have chemo tomorrow. Depending on the pass, we might head over to Desert Aire when I'm finished. I could use a change of scenery.

Dreaming Big,
Doreen

Bowling Night

After yesterday's busy day, I decided to stay in my jammies all day so I wouldn't be tempted to leave the house. I had plenty of things to do to keep me busy. It's been almost a month since my last treatment so I had almost forgotten about the achy joints that visit me the day after chemo. Staying home and laying low was just what my body needed.

Angie is on spring break this week so she has plenty of time on her hands. She called me this afternoon with this great idea to go bowling. So, Angie and Shannon went to the Goodwill, bought "bowling shirts", a trophy with a woman bowler in a skirt, took the shirts home and turned them into "real bowling shirts" then called Amy and Mel and invited them to go along. When Angie and Shannon showed up at our house tonight to meet up with Amy and Mel, the laughter was contagious. The girls looked hilarious. Our daughters have been competitive their whole lives and now tonight they started their "new bowling league". Whoever wins each night will get to take home the "ugly" trophy. We're waiting patiently for a call from the winner...because I know someone will have to rub it in. They told me I could bring a friend as my partner some time and we could work hard for the "trophy" if we're interested. I'm looking for a ringer of a bowler....give me a call if you can help me out :)

We are still really thrilled by the results of yesterdays appointment. Each great visit like this gives us hope for many more months of health and happiness.

Time to head to bed and dream big,

Hugs, Dor

Quick Update

I'm going to make this a quick little message as I'm having a hard time keeping my eyes open. Rick's scans came back great. The tumors in his liver are all smaller and all the other tumors (lungs, lymph nodes) remained stable. The doctor is really happy with the results of today.

As for me. Chemo went great, but I tested positive for RSV again so I walked around in my mask all day. They are going to do a nasal wash and a swab of my throat each week until I test negative. Apparently this isn't something to play with. I'm actually feeling better but they aren't taking any chances.

Now, I need to grab a little bite to eat (some leftover Shepard's Pie from last night....it was delicious) then head off to bed. I'm pooped.

Thanks for all the prayers and well wishes,
Dreaming Big~
Dor

Spring is really here

Except for the rainy part (which is often), I really love springtime. Flowers, fresh air, sunshine, newly cut grass....does it get much better?

It's been another uneventful weekend. Just working on getting better. This coming week is a big one. I start my chemo treatments again and Rick has his first scan since we started this new chemo regime. Tuesday will be a long, but very important day. He has his scan in the morning and the results late in the day. My chemo doesn't start until 10:00ish so I hope I'm still awake when we meet with his doctor. Angie is going with us (it's her spring break) so she can be our other set of ears and the official note taker. It's so nice to have someone else at our appointments on days like this. Having one of the kids is always extra special.

I'm now hooked up to Facebook and I've become a little addicted to it. I talk to people I haven't seen or heard from in years. I also have a virtual pet that I feed, and bathe, and walk. It's pretty fun when you have the time to spare.

I don't know about the rest of you, but I'm starting to get "basketballed out". I usually love March Madness....but I'm having a little March Madness of my own. The sound of the squeaky shoes on the gym floor, the cheerleaders chanting, the refs whistles....Ugh, I need to watch a movie or something with a little humor in it!

Don't forget that March is Colon Cancer Awareness month so "GET YOUR BUTT TO THE DOCTOR". Early detection saves lives.

I need to go now and work on my Bonnie J. Addario Lung Cancer Foundation "webisode". I'll tell you all about it once the project is finished. It's going to be exciting.

One last thing, I know the economy is tight this year but Relay for Life is only 2 months away and we are way below our goal. If you're interested in participating or donating (any amount counts) go to the link http://main.acsevents.org/site/TR/RelayForLife/RFLFY09GW?team_id=373324&pg=team&fr_id=14556 and show your support. Thanks in advance for your generosity.

Dreaming Big,
Doreen

Cleaning Fairies are Here!

Today I was blessed by 2 cleaning fairies. At 8:00am my door bell rang and my sister in law, Dawn was at the door with 2 friends who have a cleaning company. For Dawn's birthday this year, she asked her friends and family to just give money so she could hire some help for me. I was honored, but I felt overwhelmed by her graciousness. I clean my house regularly but having a crew come in to really deep clean is such a blessing. When I bend over I always have a coughing spell, so cleaning toilets, bathtubs, behind things is a much bigger chore than it used to be.

So here I am, at the computer while the busy bees are making my house sparkle. I should have a party....No, then you guys would just dirty it up. :)

Nothing major planned again this weekend. We are still working on recuperating. I've found that by 3pm each day, I'm ready for a nap. For the past 3 days....I've slept from 3 to 7ish. Amy said she likes it when I take a nap because I'm a lot more fun after 7 o'clock. Usually, I doze off while we're having a conversation if I haven't taken a nap. Then she'll ask me about something the next day and I have no idea what she's talking about. That could just be because of old age...

Have a fabulous weekend.

Dream Big,
Doreen

Chemo is back on!

I got a call from Seattle Cancer Care today and here's the game plan. I guess I've not missed too many treatments, so beginning next Tuesday, I'll start IPI-504 again. I was thrilled by the news.

This morning I had a wonderful massage, then Megan met me in Stanwood when my massage was over. We shopped around Stanwood, went to lunch, then she collected on the massage she got for her birthday in February. I came home, visited my dad, Jake and Theresa Haugstad (who brought dinner), then fell asleep on the couch for a couple of hours. I'm now full and rested :) and ready to watch Survivor.

Rick is starting to feel a little better, as am I.

Thanks for the delicious cookies, Bill and Jane. If they are as healthy as you said they are, we should be healed by tomorrow. :)

Dream Big,
Dor

Here's the scoop

I'm sitting here at Seattle Cancer Care waiting for Rick to head in for his treatment. We've both been to our doctor's appointments. We're still working on a game plan for me, but Rick's counts are great so he'll be having his infusion around 10:00am. His CEA count is down to 12.7 - Yahoo!

We were hoping to be back in time to attend our friends father's funeral this afternoon. I'm not sure how that will work out, but I'm sure they know we've been thinking about them.

I'd better get back upstairs with Rick, but I thought you might like to know how things are going.

Keep dreaming big,
Doreen

It's gonna get better around here...

Over the past 3 weeks, I've tried my best to keep life as normal as I knew how. It hasn't worked. I haven't done much of anything, yet I'm exhausted, emotional and tired most of the time. I thought it was all because of the "virus" but I don't think that's entirely the problem. My life (which is normally quite boring) has been in constant disarray. Though I've been coughing for the past 3 years, this cough is different. I actually feel a little bit "crazy" from it. Not only have I felt crummy, but I missed an entire cycle of chemotherapy. I've not been to my doctor's office for my general appointments in almost a month. The clinical trial coordinator is looking into the criteria to make sure I can even continue to do this trial because of how many infusions I've missed. Food doesn't interest me. I don't sleep well. Writing on the blog has become a chore because my words don't seem to make sense anymore. It's easy to understand how any one of these things can knock you off your feet, but when you put them all together and add a sick husband I guess it's understandable that I'm struggling with sanity issues.

I appreciate all your love and concern and want to assure you that one of these days the "old Doreen" will be back. I'm not sure how long this recovery process will take but please be patient with me. If I haven't blogged and you're worried, then just send me an e-mail at dreambig@wavecable.com I promise to write back.

I love you more than all the flower bulbs sticking their little heads through the dirt. (I need to get well soon since spring is one of my favorite times of the year)

Dreaming Restless in Stanwood,
Dor

Sickness Sucks

I went to Stanwood to see my parents after I finished teaching today. I only went up to see my parents once this week and have been doing my best to avoid their germs at all cost. Today, however, was an exception. I missed them... not to mention Shannon and I thought it sounded like more fun watching the NCAA March Madness games on my parents big screen TV rather than on ours.

To be very honest with you, my mom is frustrated and tired of being sick. I know that she has been "sick" for nearly 3 years with Cancer but it is this recent battle with RSV that has pushed her to a whole new level. She is tired of having to call the Cancer Care Alliance to see what they have planned next, or how her scan results came back, or if she is allowed to be in the same room as my dad since she is not 100% sure that her virus is gone. She just wants them to be the ones making contact with her and keeping her in the loop rather than the other way around. After a tearful conversation with her oncologist this evening she seems to be more hopeful that he will help her through this rocky road that she is currently traveling. I think it helped her to be re-assured that he is always a phone call or email away.

When we left my parents house tonight my dad was asleep on the couch with a bad headache and my mom was getting ready to throw some dinner in the oven (thanks to the donated dinner from a Stanwood School District employee. Thanks!) We are hoping that some rest and relaxation over the weekend will help them feel a little bit better.

Dreaming of Cough-less nights,
Angie

Happy belated St. Patty's Day

It had been so long since I wrote a blog that once I got started last night, I couldn't stop. I also forgot to say Happy St. Patty's Day, thanks Ginger for dinner, thanks Cathy for my morning cream of wheat and cup of tea.

I forgot to mention that the rest of my family is also on the mend. Rick s going back to work today, Jake still sounds congested (Megan caught whatever Jake had), Amy is still coughing but says she thinks she's getting better also. Luckily, Angie has taken really good care of herself (which is a hard thing to do at an elementary school) and she is feeling good. Just too much time on her hands to worry about us.

I'm on my way to my much needed massage....
Talk to you later.

Love, Dor

On the mend

After 10 days of feeling drained, wiped out, sicker than a dog....today I think I may have rounded the corner into a healthier life. I found that the past couple of weeks have been filled with fear, not just being sick. I guess I realized that what was happening to my body might be the beginning to the end of beating the odds. For nearly 3 years, I was a cancer patient who didn't look or act the part. I learned that RSV is not just a dyslexic class on RV'S. Now, I know that even sick people get "sick". I'm not sure how much longer I'll be under the weather but I do know that I'm making forward progress and this viral infection is nothing more than a bump in the road.

When you enter our house we have a basket filled with gloves, masks, bacterial cleaner but today we realized that there were no instructions once you entered. Pam, took it upon herself to make us a sign to help all of you out. I've attached of the poster on our door. Humor is still the best kind of medicine.


I'm sure there are times when you guys get sick of listening to me talk about my wonderful friends and family, but their love and kindness were a testament over these past couple of weeks. Without their strength and selflessness I'm not sure how I would have survived

Over the next couple of weeks I'm looking forward to working with Carol Lin and TulahHealth on webisodes for the Bonnie J. Addario Lung Cancer Foundation. Expect a lot of change in the world we once knew as Lung Cancer.

Tomorrow I'm finally going to make it in to the Wellness Center for a much needed massage. I'm sure by tomorrow I will be as good as new.

Rick and I have just crawled into bed with the hopes of getting a good night's sleep. Hope to talk to you again tomorrow.

Stay Healthy and Happy,

Big Dreamer Dor

Saturday Night Update

I spent over an hour last night with Amy, giving you a huge update of what's been happening. I'm not sure where that entry went but it was mostly to thank Cathy Huntington, Kim Boyer and the kids for taking care of business. Angie had Rick to the doctor yesterday afternoon at the onset of a sore throat. We're not sure if he has strept throat yet, but we do know he 's been cleared of RSV.. As of this morning, Rick has a deep cough in his chest, Jake is still feeling the reprocutions of his first illness of the school years. Amy too woke up with a sinus infection and a terrible headache.

I plan on going home tomorrow, I promise to be on my best behavior, and keep my family safe from my germs.

I'll write more tomorrow and I'm sorry for the mix up from yesterday. Keep us in your prayers...we've got an epidemic going around the Schmitt house.

Love you more,
Doreen

Updates

The past few days my body has been unable to decide if it wants to get better or continue to be sick. My mornings usually bring a high temperature and lots of coughing. As the day progresses, my temperature usually drops from the 102 range to around 99. The problem is that it tends to do the 102 to 99 jump at least twice a day. My days are ok but my nights aren't very good. Kim, Cathy, and Amy have all taken a turn at a "night shift" with me and I feel horrible for their lack of sleep. Not only do I cough throughout the night, I also have spells where I can't breathe and start to hyper-ventilate. It's not fun for me, or my night-time helpers.

A lot of people have called and emailed about wanting to come to Seattle to "take a shift" with me but as much as I would love to see everyone, I don't want anyone else to be exposed to these germs. The doctors have told us that my chance of contaminating others lessens as my temperature goes down so I want to take a few more days to recover before I go home. I had an appointment today with the infectious disease team at the Seattle Cancer Care Alliance. I was feeling pretty cruddy at the time, so they had a chance to see me like I've been feeling everyday since Monday. During my appointment the doctors ran a new kind of chest x ray to see if they could find anything new bacteria growing. No answers yet. They put me on a nebulizer that seems to be doing some good.

Tonight I'm actually feeling pretty good.Rick woke up this morning with a sore throat. Angie jumped right on that and made him an appointment to make sure he didn't have RSV. We got a call tonight and he's safe. Now we just need to make sure he starts feeling better too.Cathy spent the day and night with me last night and today, now Kim Boyer tag teamed her out and will be spending the night, then Pam will be in Seattle to take over tomorrow. Ok, enough talk about sickness. Let's get back to having fun...I can't stay focused long enough to write any more so I'll have to say goodbye until tomorrow.

Love you more,
Dor

Time to Rest and Recover

Hi guys...it's Dor. I'm out of the hospital now, but I'm not going home for a few days because I am still contagious. Melana opened her condo for me to stay in through the weekend. It is only a mile or two from the hospital and it will give my body a chance to heal. If my temperature goes up again, or if I have any complications, I can be at the hospital in 5 minutes or less. Rick is trying to recover from chemo and he certainly doesn't need my germs around him. I have an appointment on Friday at the infectious disease clinic at the hospital. They are going to do some blood work and talk about our upcoming plans. We discussed performing a broncoscopy (biopsy) to check for any new bacteria or fungus that may be trying to make a new home in my lungs. Taking a chunk out of my lungs is certainly not our first option, so we'll do everything we can to prevent the broncoscopy. I'm hoping I just continue to get better and skip that process.

It has been a tough couple of days for all of us. All three of the kids spent a lot of time with me in the hospital on Monday and Tuesday so by the time we found out I had a contagious virus, it was too late to keep them out of harms way. Jake woke up this morning really sick. With him being a teacher and around germs all the time, it's hard to tell exactly where he got it, but I also can't rule out that he got it from me and I hate that. Jake is feeling a little better tonight so we are all hoping it was just a 24 hour flu bug.

I'm so thankful for my friends and family and all they've done for me these past few days. We have decided that we better "pick teams" for the next few days so we don't share this virus with Rick (or anyone else for that matter). The options are "Team Rick" and Team Dor" but nothing in between. It's silly for my germs to leave this condo. I'll learn more from the doctors on Friday about how long I should stay away from home. I just know that I'm already missing my Ricky's face and little bald head, and it's only Wednesday.

I love you more than all the times I've coughed over the past 4 days...boy, are you loved!

Dreaming Big,
Dor

Dor's HAZMAT team

What a roller coaster the last 24 hours has been. Mom was taken to the University of Washington Medical Center last night and is still there . After almost six hours in the Emergency Room, she was admitted and taken to her room in the cancer ward a little after midnight. Her friend Cathy volunteered to sleep in her room so the family could get a little bit of rest at home. My dad stayed at a hotel near the Seattle Cancer Care Alliance so he would be close to the hospital for his chemo this morning. Prior to all of the family leaving the hospital last night we were already notified that my mom would not be allowed to participate in her clinical trial today. Her temperature was hovering around 102 for most of the evening and her coughing was causing a lot of pain thru her ribs. She was having a tough time breathing so they put her on oxygen and that seemed to help.

Mom called me this morning around 6:30 and she sounded great. I felt much more optimistic after the call. While mom continued to rest at UW with Cathy, I joined my dad at SCCA for his medical appointment and chemo. When his chemo started, he immediately fell asleep. I went over to the other hospital to check on my mom and I was shocked to see her looking so bad again. Her temperature was back up around 102 and she was struggling with her coughing.

The doctors seemed a little bit surprised by her symptoms because her blood work was within the normal range and her chest X-ray looked fine, but her coughing and fever were both unusual. After being in the room with mom all day the doctor's came in with the results of her blood work. They were in masks, rubber gloves, and protective gowns. They told us mom had a contagious virus called RSV. They made us put on the suits which we like to refer to as our "hazmat suits". Her virus is rare and usually only effects infants, elderly people, and people with compromised immune systems. As long as a person has a normally functioning immune system, they are unlikely to be effected by the RSV virus. We put on the suits like they told us to, but after cuddling with her for 6 or more hours in the ER last night and sitting next to her bed all day today, we have obviously been exposed to it.

Cathy drove my dad home after his chemo because they both needed a good night of rest and he certainly didn't need to be around a contagious virus more than he already had been. Kim Boyer drove to Seattle this evening so she can stay at the hospital with mom tonight. Sleeping in a hospital chair is not pleasant (you can ask Cathy if you don't believe me) but for Kim to sleep in a hospital chair tonight... in a hazmat suit... she deserves a gold star.

If mom continues to be stable over night she will be released in the morning. She will need to rest at home and beat this virus on her own, without medicine. Like most other viruses, there is not a "medicine" to cure this so she will need to rest and get lots of fluids.

Obviously Dor will want to see people, but please be prepared to wear a mask if you stop by their house. Also, I think it goes without saying that there shouldn't be any children at their house for a week or two. If you have a cold, or don't feel well for any reason, please pick up the phone to say hello instead of stopping by the house.

I am attaching a few photos from this evening at the hospital. As you can see, Dor had a very supportive "Hazmat" team.

Thanks to everyone for the nice phone calls and emails today. A special thanks to Cathy and Kim for dropping everything and sleeping with Dor at the hospital so the rest of the family could go home and rest. You guys are life-savers.

Dreaming Big-

Amy

Quick Update...

Yesterday afternoon some guests came into town to film a special story on our family. We got together last night for some of mom's good lasagna and to share our stories with the film crew. Even though there were ten of us we still had leftovers (as you probably know, mom doesn't know how to cook for a small number of people). We laughed, shared childhood memories, and shed plenty of tears. Before we knew it, it was 10pm and we were all exhausted.

After a late night, mom woke up this moring feeling horrible. She spent all day in bed with Kathy by her side. As the day progressed she began feeling worse and worse, but since she's supposed to be having chemo tomorrow we were hoping she'd be able to make it through the day and wait until tomorrow to see the doctor. By about 5:30pm her fever hit 102 degrees and we all decided that mom couldn't wait anymore. Angie and Shannon are taking mom down to UW Medical Center and the film crew is shortly behind. I'm sure they had no clue what they were getting themselves in to when they called and said they wanted to do a story on our family. We always seem to be on a rollercoaster of emotions.

We'll fill you all in as we know more, but for now Dad and I are headed to be with mom at UW.

Praying for the best,
Amy

How sweet it's been

These past few days filled with basketball are (as usual) one of my yearly highlights.  I see people that I generally only see once a year down here in Tacoma.  Excitement fills the air.  You get to witness athletes and their parents crying together (sometimes they are tears of joy, other times they're tears of sorrow) but either way it's a memory that I have never forgotten during those times when it was my family in those shoes.

Besides watching basketball games, I told you that I was also watching Angie officiate games at the highest level she can go with High School sports.  Tonight, not only did she get her cake and eat it too, but it had a frosting she'll never forget.  Angie and 2 other officials will be officiating the championship game tomorrow night at 7:00pm on Fox Sports.  She was evaluated all week on her ability and today it paid off.  We are so proud of her hard work.  More than anything, we're happy to be alive to see her in action.

It's late now and I've been crying for the past half hour, so I'd better sign off and call it a day.

Rick and I are both feeling fine.  A little cough and shingle pain are very tolerable when you've got a giant smile on your face.

Dreams Do Come True,

Dor

State Basketball

You all know me well enough to know that I'm having a fabulous time watching hours and hours of high school basketball.  Only this time...it's different.  Since Angie started officiating and Rick and I got sick, she has so badly wanted to be on the court as a referee at the State Tournament and for us to be around to see it.  This morning as I sat in the stands watching my beautiful daughter with a whistle hanging out of her mouth, I got a little tear in my eye knowing that another dream came true.  I'm not sure which of us was happier.  She did an amazing job and we are so proud.   She has another game tonight at 8:30 so I'd better get my game face on and head back over to the Tacoma Dome.

Until later ~ Keep dreaming big,

Doreen

Happy Monday

It's the Bachelor Finale tonight (except for little piece they left out where there will be another finale tomorrow because he changes his mind). For those of you who don't watch it. Good for you. For those of us crazy lovenuts who do....thank goodness it's almost over. What did we do with our Monday nights before this started?

Yesterday was a fabulous day. We celebrated Amy, Angie and Megan's birthday with a nice dinner, lots of laughter, we played beauty shop (Angie needs to be "smokin' hot" for her state referee debut), and we finished the evening with cheesecake topped with fresh strawberries.

I'm so happy that we both have the week off from chemo. My body is aching more than usual from a build up from the drugs. I'm hoping to feel better in the next couple of days. I have lots of basketball to watch this week and I don't want to be whining about my knee the whole time.

I have some exciting news to share with you regarding "our story" that's being produced in the coming months. I don't have all the details, but you'll be the first to know as soon as I do.

I'd better go check on the soup I'm making for dinner.

Keep dreaming big,
Dor

Happy Birthday Amy & Angie

Our baby girls are 32 years old today. Where did the time go? I swear it was only yesterday that Angie hit Amy in the head with a meat tenderizer and she had dots on her forehead for weeks (Amy wore a stocking cap for days - in the middle of the summer - so no one would notice). They were the most adorable and loved little kids I knew. Big brown eyes, wavy dark hair and smiles that would melt your heart. Not much has changed. Angie still hits Amy with kitchen utensils, and their kindness and generosity would melt your heart in the middle of the Arctic Circle. They are NOT for SALE but they can be leased for a good price. Happy Birthday my beautiful little angels.

This morning (or afternoon) when we got up, Rick showed me an area on his tummy/side that was a little bothersome. After one look, Dr. Doreen diagnosed shingles. I first thought to myself "are you kidding me"? Then I called the doctor. As I assumed, they wanted Rick to see a physician and to get some antiviral medicine. So, this afternoon was spent in the waiting room of the Everett Clinic where my diagnosis was confirmed. After his appointment we headed to Smokey Point for a quick trip to Costco, Safeway then back to Stanwood to pick up his medicine. It might sound funny to those of you with REAL LIVES, but I almost felt like it was a date. Do you think I need to get out more? So far, Rick is not complaining of pain. Let's hope he has a mild case of them.

The kids are all coming up tomorrow to celebrate the girls birthday. We're going to have a great time and I'm sure lots of laughing will come into play.

I'm having a hard time keeping my eyes open so I've gotta get to bed and catch up on that beauty sleep I always mention.

Until tomorrow,
Love you more~Dor

Scans Looked Great

Stable: the art of keeping one's cancer from growing. Stable: Bigger is not always better. Stable: 6 more weeks of the clinical trial. Everything looks good. (However, the pneumonia is still lurking but I'm taking antibiotics for that)

It was great to hear those words again. I really believe in miracles and everyday I wake up is another one.

Stanwood boys basketball lost their game tonight. I was sorry to see their season end but they've had a good year and they still have lots of talent coming back next year.

Tomorrow night our cousin Ally will be playing in the girls championship game. Best of luck sweetie.

I got back from treatment today and immediately went to the basketball game with my dad and Rick. Needless to say, I'm exhausted so I've got to call it a night and get some rest!

Until tomorrow,
Dream Big~Dor

Fantastic Day

This morning I was greeted by my friends Morgan and Kelly (their 2 smiling faces) and a bouquet of sunflowers. What a way to start a day. The scan was uneventful so I hoping for great results tomorrow. Stable....stable....stable.... I do have a stomache ache this evening (probably from the stuff I have to drink before the scan) but no worries...it will be gone in the morning, just in time for chemo. After our day at SCCA, the 3 of us went to lunch at one of Amy and Melana's favorite places to eat; Tutta Bella. Awesome salad (on a flatbread) and brick oven baked pizzas. We made it back home just in time for Kelly to pick her son up from school. The day couldn't have been planned any better. Thanks girls for the special day.

On the way home this afternoon I got a phone call from Angie saying that I needed to call Rick at work because she needed to tell us something "together" and he can put us on a conference call. (Needless to say he got new phones and doesn't know how to do the "conference" part anymore) so she just told her dad the good news on his phone and I got to hear about it later. Most of you know that Angie refs high school and college women's basketball games. In the ref world it takes many years to advance as far as the state tournament. In Angie's world it happened today. She got a call that she'll be officiating at the State 4A women's basketball tournament in Tacoma next week (where Rick and I have gone every year since the early 90's). We are so excited to have the opportunity to see our daughter officiate some of the greatest games of her life.

One of the things on my bucket list was to be able to watch Angie work her way to the top in this career. She was an amazing little player back in the days. The last time she was on the floor in the Tacoma Dome was when her high school team was competing for what she hoped was the state title. Instead, she tore her ACL in the 2nd quarter of the first game and never entered another high school game.

She was a very emotional today when she called. She's always hoped to be chosen by her peers to get an opportunity like this, but more importantly she was so elated that her dad and I are still here to see it. I've cried tears of joy all afternoon. Do you think I should wear a shirt in the crowd that says "I love my Ref". Ok, just kidding. I do need to get her hair lightened and cut so she looks her best on the evening news highlights :) I'm attaching a photo of Angie and Susie (Shannon's golden doodle) with her Ruf-fur-ree shirt on. She wanted to get in on the action and congratulate Angie as well.

Only 2 more days till my babies turn 32....Wow, when I say that out loud it kind of hurts. I'm having the kids up for dinner on Sunday to celebrate the February birthdays. I can't wait to see them all.

Amy has a rec league basketball game tonight and if she wins, she'll play in her championships next Thursday night. Jake's 7th grade girls basketball team is 3 -1. I'm telling you, just when I thought I was done watching hoops, they've come back into our lives in different ways and I couldn't be prouder of the kids.

You'll hear from one of us tomorrow about how the scan went.

Until then, Dream Big!
Love you more ~ Dor

Happy Birthday Pammy

Today is Pammy, my red-headed friends birthday. She's getting very close to social security age and I encouraged her to quit her job and start collecting. That way, she'll have plenty of time to do fun things with me. She reminded me that people can't make it on their SS alone. Ok, I guess I'll let her work for a couple more years.

Scan day again tomorrow. I'm not sure what they'll find in my lungs since I assume I still have some signs of pneumonia. Let's just pray for STABILITY in the size of the tumors!

What's happening with this weather of ours...sunny one minute, snow the next. Will it ever end?

We took down our old vertical blinds in our bedroom today and I replaced them with some beautiful crinkly silky drapes...I love it! It completely changed the room. Ok, maybe not completely, but it sure looks great!

I won't know anything about the results until Friday so I probably won't write again until then.

Dream Big,
Dor

Great day in Seattle

Everything went well today in Seattle. My blood count was almost back in the normal range so Dr. Eaton let me have chemo. I got a little sick this time but I feel much better tonight. Rick's CEA count is still going down....Yahoo! He's sitting in the living room as we speak soaking his Piggy's in Epsom salts. (My mom thinks it cures everything) The Erbitux is causing inflammation and pain around his toenails...so I took the opportunity to give Mom's remedy a try. I think he's enjoying it because I'm waiting on him like Cinderella :) Has anyone seen my glass slipper?

The Spartans won their basketball game tonight against Marysville. They play again on Friday night for a spot at the state tournament. How exciting for the boys and their families. Our cousin's daughter Ally and her team from Snohomish have already clinched a spot at State, so when we spend 4 straight days watching basketball at the Tacoma Dome at least I'll know some people. :) Rick could watch basketball all day without knowing a soul. I prefer to recognize a face or two.

When we got back from Seattle today I was able to get a massage. My body has felt pretty rough lately so that was just what I needed. I'm going to drink plenty of water and crawl into bed and work on getting better. I've gotta study for my CT SCAN on Thursday (I want to "pass" the test)

I'm hoping to have a little bit of fun tomorrow. I haven't been out of the house except for doctor's appointments since Friday. I'm looking for new window coverings for our bedroom. This is almost as bad as the snow...just not as cold.

Dreaming Big,
Dor

Sunny Monday

I woke up this morning to the sun coming in my bedroom window. What a fabulous way to be awakened.

I'm so happy Slumdog Millionaire won the Oscar for best picture. It was really one of the most moving films I've ever seen. I'm not a very good movie goer (well at least not for movies that are ever nominated). Comedies and chick flicks don't make it to the Academy Awards.

This is another busy week for us. Tomorrow we both have chemo (hopefully), then Thursday I have a scan, Friday we get results and hopefully I get more chemo. I think we should have bought a condo in Seattle about 3 years ago. It would have gotten plenty of use.

Rick is feeling well but really fatigued. I swear he can sit down for 2 minutes and he's asleep. I on the other hand can't get to sleep even after I've been in bed for 2 hours. Life?

I went to bed last night with an awful headache and a cold rag on my head. You can imagine how beautiful my hair looks this morning. The headache is still hanging on (though not as bad as it was last night). I really need a massage and I had to cancel on Thursday. I'm going to call her today and hope that someone else had to cancel today or Wednesday.

Now that I'm out of bed, I guess I should get a little work done.

Dreaming Big,
Dor

The way I see it!

Yesterday was spent in bed (propped up) or on the leather chair in the living room. I really tried to lay low and heal. My cough is annoying but I'm hoping that I'm coughing up the "bad stuff" that's decided to live in my lungs. The only thing on my body that's really hurting is my knee. I think I tweaked it while squatting and coughing at the same time...."she survived lung cancer but she walks with a limp". I can see the headlines now.

Shelley and I stopped at Starbuck's for a coffee on Friday morning on our way down to Seattle. For those of you who aren't Starbuck's addicts, they put some amazing sayings on the sides of their cups. This was on Shelley's and I thought it was worthy of some blog space.

"The Way I See It" #293

The way I see it
Isn't necessarily
The way you see it
Or the way it is
Or ought to be
What's more important
Is that we're all
Looking for it
And a way to see it!

--Desi Di Nardo, author and poet

Pretty powerful words coming from a cup of Java...

Love you more,
Dor

No chemo for me today!

Chemo didn't go as planned today.  My blood work showed that my white count was very high (meaning I had an infection brewing) and while I was at Seattle Cancer Care, my temperature kept rising.  Before they would let me have my chemo, my doctor sent me downstairs to get a chest x-ray to see if anything looked suspicious.  Much to my dismay, it appears I have aspiration pneumonia.  So,  they put me on a very strong antibiotic, gave me some directions about how to sleep and eat and drink, then sent me home to rest all weekend.   Amy was going to fire Shelley from being my chemo buddy (since we didn't get the job done) but she changed her mind since Shelley and I had so much fun.

My friends Diana and Kelly from Freeland met us at Seattle Cancer Care today.  Diana is nearing 3 years on Tarceva.  I guess they'll put her photo on the bottle now that she's doing so well.  It's so great to spend time with her.   It's not hard to connect with someone who shares your diagnosis and fight to life.  

I heard from some of my blog buddies today that I don't tell you often enough about how Rick is doing.  Don't you know...I'm the wife...it's suppose to be all about me :)  In all seriousness, I share everything with you about my life because I'm an open book.  Rick on the other hand is like a diary with a lock on it.  I tell you the stuff he's ok with, but for instance if he had diarrhea everyday, I wouldn't be able to tell you that.  I can tell you that he's doing very well.  He goes to work everyday (a little late...but gets his job done), he still has a rash on his face and torso, his counts are getting better, he has some fatigue and he has a little bit of fuzz on his head where his dark brown hair used to be.  

I'm going to get my jammies on and go to bed early.  I really want to kick this infection.  I've got things to do, places to go and people to see.

I'll keep you posted on Life at the Schmitt's!

Dreaming with a little fever,

P.S.  Cecilia, I would love to talk to you again.  Please send me an e-mail at dreambig@wavecable.com    Thanks!

Dor

$20.00 laying around?

Do you ever find a $20 bill in your pants or coat pocket and think...wow, today's my lucky day? I've just decided, that whenever I "find" a $20 that I forgot I even had, I'm going to send it to The One in a Million Campaign to eradicate lung cancer. For more information on how you can participate, go to: www.lungcancerfoundation.org or call 415-357-1278. If a million people send in $20 each, we can put screening clinics in hospitals all over the country. Early detection saves lives!

Thank you Bonnie Addario for having a vision that is changing my world!

Dreaming Big,
Dor

P.S. If you hadn't noticed, I couldn't sleep so I thought I'd say Hi! Amy won her games tonight...and we were there to cheer her on. I'd better try to get to some shut eye. I have chemo tomorrow and I need the beauty sleep :)

Doreen....Where are you?

Hi everyone. Remember Me? Doreen...the blog writer slacker? Well, I'm back with some great news. I've been busy lately doing a lot of nothing, but I feel like I'm making progress. :)

Yesterday I started my 6th round of chemo and my sister in law Vickie took the day off to be my chemo-buddy. We went to Seattle on Monday night (in time to watch the Bachelor on the big screen TV in our hotel room) to avoid leaving Stanwood at the crack of dawn and to miss the freeway construction. We had a blast. We laughed and talked late into the night. I felt like a school kid on an overnight trip. She double dog dared me to spit out the window (5 floors down) and if someone double dog dares you....well you know what I had to do! Luckily, no one got hurt or spit on.

During my appointment, I asked how everyone else on this trial (IPI-504) was doing. Oddly enough, I am currently the only one still on it (from SCCA). I guess there are about 50 people across America in this study, but only 5 from Seattle Cancer Care. Some people had problems with their eyes, or got blood clots, or it just didn't work. I keep wondering why I've been the lucky one? When I started on Tarceva no one anticipated that I would be taking it for 30 months. Now, I find myself the only one still benefiting from this clinical trial. During my exam yesterday the doctor said she could actually hear a difference in how clear my lungs were sounding. I can feel a difference as well. The only problem I've had with this drug is that it makes my joints ache. Usually, by my week off everything is feeling better, but this time my knees and hips were still feeling the pain. But that...my friends, is something I can live with. Achy joints are a part of life as we get older anyway. I'll just start the process a little early.

Next week I have another scan to see how my body is looking from the inside out, but I feel confidant that I'm going to stay on this drug for a long time. Please say a little prayer just for me, just for good measure.

After my treatment, I came home and took a 3 hour nap, Rick woke me in time to eat a little dinner then we headed over to the high school to watch the Stanwood Spartans beat the Jackson Timberwolves. One more win and they're off to State! Tonight, Rick, my dad, and I (and Angie for a little bit) went to Post Middle School and watched Jake coach his 7th grade girls basketball team (still undefeated after 2 games), then headed to Edmonds-Woodway to watch Angie officiate a district basketball game. It was a great game that went into overtime. She did a spectacular job (as usual). Tomorrow night, Amy (who plays in a women's league in Mt. Vernon) has a game, so we might have to go watch her play as well. We've been to one other game of her's this season and she still has lots of talent. You'd never know she's almost 32.

This is what happens when I don't write for a few days....I don't know when to shut up. I've been at the computer jabbering for the past 30 minutes about stuff you could probably care less about. But thanks anyway for listening even if you have no idea what I'm talking about.

On Friday, my buddy Shelley is taking me to chemo and she's never gone with me before. The staff at SCCA loves to meet my chemo-buddies. On Tuesday my doctor said "I can't wait to see who you bring with you each time. You have such nice friends and family". Clearly, I have a fabulous doctor if she can recognize what I've known forever.

Until I write again(and there's no guarantee when that will be), DREAM BIG and LAUGH OUT LOUD.
Love you more ~ Dor

Peaceful "Sun"day Afternoon

Sometimes when I sit down to tell you how things are going, I draw a blank. Like tonight, for instance. So I'll just give you an update on my weekend.

Rodger and Jan's anniversary party was a great event. I saw lots of people I hadn't seen in a while. I danced (until I had a little coughing meltdown while dancing and singing to "You know you make me wanna SHOUT"). After some fresh air, water, and 10 minutes of gagging and coughing, I was back to my old self again.

Chemo starts again on Tuesday (the first night of basketball playoffs) so I'm hoping I can get plenty of rest before tip off. If not, I guess I'll have to wait for Rick to come home and tell me the score. Good Luck Spartans!

I had a nice day today visiting with Angie and Shannon (though Shannon kicked my behind in Wii). Angie's been waiting for a day like today to start working in her yard. She mowed for the first time (crazy girl) and trimmed back all the foliage around her house. I sure wish I had her energy (or patience) when it came to yard work. I want it all done, yesterday and I would like to see flowers blooming by the end of the week.

Dreaming Big,
Dor

Happy Valentine's Day

Today is the day of LOVE (though I'd like to think all days should be celebrated this way). Rick and I slept in (and I'm not kidding. I had to make lunch when we got up because it was too late for breakfast). We're having a laid back day. Jake and Megan will be joining us soon and then we're going to an anniversary party tonight.

Yesterday I heard something that really struck my heart. When you are lucky enough to find your one true love, be careful not to get so comfortable in your relationship, that you take advantage of that gift of love. Make sure to look at your partner everyday and remember what attracted you in the first place. Thank them for making you laugh when you need it most. Or for loving you unconditionally. Sometimes, you might need to remind them how lucky they are to have you (but that is a whole different love story). Just kidding, I've been reminding Rick how lucky he is since the day we got married. I just don't want him to forget. He says he won't...but with the chemo brain, you never know.

It's been awesome having this whole week off from chemo. The week was filled with lots of fun and projects. Last night, Rick and I picked up our friends Dave and Val and we went out for dinner at the Conway Tavern. My stomach is still hurting from laughing while listening to the Karaoke. The music and sound system were so loud. The place was jam packed with people. I asked Val half way through the evening, "am I getting old, why does the music have to be so loud, have you ever heard of that song?". The answer is, yes...I'm getting old. But wasn't that what I was dreaming for? Old Age...

I love you more than all the chocolate and flowers given today...

Until tomorrow...keep dreaming big,
Dor

Thursdays Thoughts

Is there a difference between taking it easy...and being lazy? Please tell me there isn't. I'm really enjoying my "taking it easy routine". Oh, it's not like I do nothing...but today for instance, I didn't get out of my pj's (I just re-named them loungewear around noon) and I sat in my dining room with my friend Cathy while we made Valentine cards until around 5:30 tonight. We've decided we can't do this for a living because we would have to charge 25 dollars per card to break even.

My mom had a follow up appointment yesterday and the doctor is going to go back in and do another procedure on March 4th. We're hoping they can remove the rest of the gallstones and figure out what else might be going on in there.

Last night was a big Relay for Life meeting and although the team of committee members have been working diligently for the past 4 months, last night was my motivation to get started. I have so much info in my head from all the events I've been to in the past few months, I need to start sharing. It's no good to be the "keeper of the knowledge" if you're not going to share with others. With the economy struggling like it is this year, we are going to have to get creative to raise money for the charitys that are close to our hearts. Though you hear me talk about the ACS a lot, my love is really for the Bonnie J. Addario Lung Cancer Foundation. I am so moved when I read her website and see another amazing thing she has done for research, awareness and treatment. I say this often, and I really mean it...she has changed my life :)

Tomorrow is my daughter in law's 24th birthday. Happy Birthday Meg! We'll be celebrating on Saturday at our friends Rodger and Jan's 25th wedding anniversary.

While making cards today, I came across a new saying that I loved and I think you will too...

Life is a great big canvas, and you should throw all the paint on it you can.

I've added a photo of Rick and I from the wedding. He has hair and mine looked cute so I thought I'd share it with you.

Dreaming Big,
Dor

CEA count is going down

When you have colon cancer,the tumor marker they judge the growth on is called the CEA. Rick's numbers have been all over the board. When he was first diagnosed, his numbers were 59.8. Normal is between 0-2. During his first year of treatment they were able to keep his numbers within that "normal range". Then as his body started to change and the cancer began to spread his numbers started rising...rapidly. Just about a month ago his CEA was nearly 140. Today they were down to 26.4 Once they have given Rick a new CT scan we will be reassured that the Erbitux is doing what it was expected to do. We are so blessed that Rick had the right DNA to even be able to take this drug.

I hooked up my new humidifier last night and I already felt a change this morning. It could just be wishful thinking, but I think I'm on the road to less coughing....

Be careful on the roads over the next few days. It's icy and snowy and dangerous.

Dreaming happy and BIG....
Dor

Fantastic Weekend

This weekend was set aside for my sister in law Vickie. It was her birthday and she wanted Rick and I to join her and her husband Tom for a fun time in Poulsbo. Not that I didn't believe her judgement in locations, I just "wondered" what we could possible do to keep ourselves busy in "Poulsbo"? Truth is, we had a grand time. Poulsbo is a really cute little city (a lot like Leavenworth) with a bakery that is out of this world. Every meal we ate was memorable and I would definitely take the time to go there again.

My doctor's appointment went well on Friday. I went with 2 old friends who helped me laugh all afternoon. I'm going to buy a humidifier tomorrow and start on a new inhaler (attached to my nebulizer) to try and control this cough. It's starting to make me crazy. Oh wait...I've been crazy for a long time.

I'll write more tomorrow, but for now I'm going to get into bed and call it a day.

Dreaming Big,
Dor

Another day of fun and games at Chemo

I'm really looking forward to tomorrow's treatment. I'll be spending the day with 2 of my dear friends, Donna and Cathy. We haven't been together for a long time, so we've decided to make a day of it tomorrow. It was Donna's birthday earlier this week so we're hoping to celebrate at lunch.

I'm looking forward to a fun weekend with Tom and Vickie at Poulsbo celebrating her birthday. She says they have a bakery to "die for" in town but I don't think I'll try anything. :) I would hate to die on an apple fritter!

The 4 of us have a good time together laughing and teasing Vickie...

Rick and I are both feeling pretty good and I'm hoping we stay that way over the weekend.

I'll try to bring the computer along to let you know how our weekend is working out. If all goes well, I might even send you some photos.

Have a safe and happy weekend.

Dreaming Big,
Dor

Early Morning Coughing Spell

I woke myself up a few minutes ago coughing. I also woke Rick up. And the neighbor dog. And some people down the street. So, while I'm up, waiting for some meds to take hold, I thought I would drop you a note. I hope I'm not waking you as well :)

I mentioned yesterday about a wonderful opportunity I was given to go to Orlando regarding Lung Cancer. It is scheduled for the same weekend as Relay and after much thought and conversation...I think I'm going to pass on the chance. I am given opportunities all the time to learn and grow when it comes to cancer research, information, new trials. For many of you, the only time we work on eradicating cancer together is at Relay for Life and many of you do it with me in mind. I can't miss it. And I don't want to miss seeing you. I still have big plans to go to California and meet with an amazing team down there (just no date set), I always have the GALA in November, and numerous chances for education throughout the year. So, my decision is made. I'll be home for Relay and don't forget, together we can make a difference.

Amy, Angie, Megan, Sister in law Vickie, and Pam all celebrate their birthdays this month. I might need to get a job just so I can help them celebrate. Happy Birthday to all my "girls".

Dreaming Big and sleepy,
Dor

Quick Note

I made a conscious effort to have fun on chemo days, no matter what. Janeen had an appointment in Seattle today as well, so we went to Seattle last night, then out to dinner with Amy and Mel at a great little restaurant in Wallingford, had our room upgraded (at no cost) to a beautiful view room that overlooked Lake Union, and enjoyed every minute of our evening.

When we got up this morning, the sky and water had a pink glow to them and it looked like it was going to be a perfect day. Janeen brought me to my appointment, took care of her business, then met me back at SCCA to finish up my infusion. Everything went smooth and when we left the building, it was actually sunshining.

While I was at my appointment today, Dr. Krystana told me about a wonderful opportunity to go to a lung cancer seminar in Orlando in May. When she heard about it, she signed up and learned that it was for patients as well. She said she immediately thought of me and sent me the information to apply for a travel grant to go. I'm going to work on that tomorrow and see if they think I'm worthy of attending. I'll let you all know later. What a wonderful experience this would be.

I've been asleep for a while and I actually just got up to get a glass of water. I'm sleepy (groggy) so I'm making this short and heading back to bed.

Tomorrow I'm hoping to go with my mom to her follow up appointment. I want her to have an extra set of ears listening when the Dr.'s tell her about her gallbladder problems. I think she's happy to have me come along.

Dreaming Big with heavy eyes,
Dor

Super Bowl :(

Well, the team I was rooting for didn't win, but it was a great game. I guess that's why they call it the SUPER BOWL. Angie has been sending text messages and photos...she is having the time of her life. We had a great time at Jake and Megan's today with her mom and dad, and Amy and Mel (who just got back from Mexico...and have the skin color of cocoa) The food was great, we yelled a lot, laughed even more, and even shed a tear or two for the Arizona Cardinals.

My mom is still feeling pretty good after her surgery, but we aren't done with the procedures they need to do to get all the gall stones out. Just one more body part I didn't care knowing about. Seriously, I could be a doctor. I've been saying it for months.....but I know boobs, butts, lungs, livers and now gallbladders more than I'd ever hoped to know about them.

In the past few weeks (since the pneumonia), I've noticed that I get winded more, or if I do too much without resting in between chores, I have coughing spells that I think are going to end up with coughing up a lung. Because my lungs are compromised they just don't heal as quickly so I have to put up with some of the consequences. The good part is that they still hold oxygen, they still allow me to laugh, and talk, and walk, and breathe. That's how I feel about my body too. I'm always complaining about my weight or how unhappy I am with the way I look, but I've decided that I love this body I'm in. It gets me where I'm going. It let's me do all the things I need and want to do. They still make clothes to fit me (so thankfully I don't have to go naked yet). We all need to think this way more often. Life is so much more fulfilling when you're living happily.

Let me leave you with this thought...

It's only possible to live happily ever after on a day to day basis. Make it a priority!

Dreaming Big,
Dor

Fantastic Friday

Here's what's happening in the busy world according to "Schmitt".  Thursday was a great massage day, then an overnight trip to Seattle with my chemo buddy Cathy.  We spent the night at Melana's since she is on a vacation and we were able to get some extra sleep this morning before going to my appointments.  

Last night we had a wonderful dinner at Ivar's Salmon house on Lake Union, came home and looked at all the wedding photos, watched Grey's Anatomy and Private Practice then went to bed and slept like babies.  This morning we  got ready and walked over to a quaint little bakery and had a coffee and a danish.

Everything went well with Chemo today.  Every appointment was early and it didn't take much longer than an hour and a half in the infusion room.  I pretty much have this process down to a science now.   I told my doctor that I believe I'm living with just the right amount of denial.  It allows me to have fun with what ever friend or relative brings me down for my appointment, then I get "real" during the infusion....then it's back to fun and games.  Both of my doctors today said I had a healthy amount of denial.  I think they're very smart.

Yesterday before I left for Seattle, I spoke with Sheila from Bonnie J. Addario's Lung Cancer Foundation and they are working on a "story of lung cancer" and they asked if I was willing to share mine.  I share it with all of you everyday so, I said "why not"?  They really want to show the world that lung cancer doesn't have to look like a old unhealthy smoker.  I'll keep you all posted on how it's coming along.

My mom is still feeling well.  Let's hope that keeps us.  Rick is doing well.  He is really adjusting to the fatigue and the other side effects that came with this Erbitux.  I'm praying that this is as rough as it gets for a while.  We need a break.

Angie is in Tampa right now with Shannon celebrating the Super Bowl.  I haven't talked to her tonight but Jake did and she told him that she had her photo taken with 3 famous football players.  I can't wait to see her photo album when she gets home.  I'm sure she's having a ball.

Amy is finishing up her Mexican siesta and is due home tomorrow.  We are all spending Super Bowl at Jake and Megan's on Sunday (except Angie who will actually be at the game in Tampa). 

I had such a great time with Cathy over the past couple of days and I hope she knows how much I appreciate the time and love she shares with me when I know she has lots of other things on her plate.  You're a priceless gem.  

When I got home today, Cathy tucked me in on the sofa and I woke up tonight around 6:45 when Rick got home.  The sleep was just what I needed.  

I hope you're all rooting for the Arizona Cardinals this weekend.  (Don't forget how Pittsburgh cheated when they played the Seahawks a couple of years ago....I'm not bitter....)

Dreaming Big (and tired)

Dor

Updates

1st - I must thank Derby Photography for allowing us to post the wedding photos. They were an amazing group of women who took beautiful shots of the bride, groom, and the rest of the party.

2nd - Chemo went well for Rick and I yesterday. I slept for 6 hours while he got his chemo so I was actually awake to drive us home. That was a first.

3rd - My mom's gall bladder surgery went well, but they couldn't get all the stones out. So, today she had another procedure that I took her to where they went down her throat and into her small intestine, pancreas and bile duct looking for free floating stones. They were still unable to get them all. She will need to go to Seattle for a special kind of ultra sound to try and remedy this problem.

I got home from the hospital with my dad tonight at 8:30 and I'm exhausted. Tomorrow night I'll be spending the night in Seattle again because I have early morning chemo again. This week has been filled with a little too much excitement and it's only Wednesday.

Amy is finishing up a trip to Mexico and Angie is getting ready to head off to the SuperBowl. I'm so glad they take time to have fun. No one ever died saying....boy, I wish I hadn't had so much fun in my life!

Until tomorrow, Dream Big and Sleep well.
Love you bunches, Dor

Monday Memo...

They've scheduled my mom's gallbladder surgery for tomorrow morning. Bad timing for me. Rick and I both have chemo tomorrow so I'll have to keep in touch via the phone. I wish I could be at the hospital to ask questions and listen to what they have to say, but I'll rely on my dad and Aunt to take notes for me.

Jake dropped off the disc from the wedding photographer so I got to look at over 800 amazing photos from that night. I'll post a few at a time. They really are beautiful.

Rick and I are spending the night in Seattle so we can get a little extra sleep before our appointments in the morning. Rick gets his third treatment of Erbitux and so far he is tolerating it pretty well. We've really kept the rash under control and there's not much he can do about the hair so he's adjusting. I love to rub his head...it really doesn't bother me at all. I just think it makes him cuter.

I'm looking forward to starting my treatment again. Let's hope the weather stays good and I don't get sick so I can have all 4 of my scheduled treatments. I can only get better as long as I'm taking the meds as directed.

Enjoy the photos...
Dreaming Big ~ Dor

Glad to be home

First thing we did after we got home (and unloaded the SUV), Rick took be down to see my mom and dad. After talking with all the family members these past few days, I knew mom was feeling better, but I also knew they had released her to go home for a few days until they could get her surgery scheduled. What I needed...was to see her. And hug her. And scold my parents for not calling IMMEDIATELY. I brought mom a bouquet of tulips (since I couldn't find a sunflower anywhere in the state) and a box of campfire girl mints. (They aren't for her to eat, but I thought it would be a nice thing to offer her guests). Isn't it funny how just touching someone you love can make you feel better. That's how I'm feeling tonight. Relieved. Optimistic. Glad to be home.

We had a great time with Reid, Cathy, Bobby & Dy (minus the broken water pipe problem and the loose shingles). We all visited at our Uncle Mel and Aunt Jessie's new house, told lots of stories that some people will never live down and just had a genuinely nice time. We played board games, dice games, card games and liar's poker with a dollar bill at breakfast. (I LOST, surprise, surprise)

With all the help from our friends, we got the Desert Aire house cleaned up in no time, went out for breakfast, then headed home around 1:00pm. I can't wait to go back there again. I forgot how much I enjoy the peace and quiet (if that's what you're in the mood for), or the laughter and friendships (if that was on your agenda instead.) It's my Heaven away from Home

Love you more than all the goosebumps on my body right now. When we got home the temperature was in the 50's (inside...ugh). It's getting better now.

Dreaming Big,
Doreen

Sorry I missed you yesterday.

Yesterday, after a busy morning of working on household repairs, I called my mom (Myrna) for our morning chat. What I'd discovered was that she was taken to the hospital at 3:30 the previous morning....she just forgot to call me (on purpose) so I wouldn't worry about it. Apparently, mom has a bad gallbladder and will be scheduled for surgery very soon. We couldn't rush right home because we had half our house torn apart. The kids have all been there representing our family and giving grandma all the love she needs. I've been keeping in contact with someone all day long. I think they're getting tired of me. :)

Everything is in working order, roofs have been repaired, any mess that we made was cleaned up. Today has been a wonderful day visiting with Reid, Cathy, Bob and Dy. We just came down to Uncle Mel and Aunt Jessie's new house to check it out! What a nice place they have. When we woke up this morning we'd had a dusting of snow. How beautiful it is!

I'd better get back to my company, but I promise to write more soon if I learn anything new about my mom.

Dreaming Big,
Dor

P.S. I forgot to mention that last night while we played Apples to Apples...Reid was the Champion of the World...not that we're competitive or anything.

Wet Surprise :(

Rick and I had not been on a journey to Desert Aire since the end of October so we decided what the heck. This is our off week from chemo, the pass looks great, the weather is starting to warm up a little and we just needed a little break.

In the past few months, there have been over 2o robberies so we were pleasantly surprised when we unlocked the door and "no one" had stopped by to help themselves to any of our valuable household items. No broken windows, vandalism.... What a nice feeling to know that we were spared. But wait...did I tell you we hadn't turned on the water yet? Well, once we did....oh, la, la...we had sprung a leak. With all the water turned off, all the water mess cleaned up on the kitchen floor and the downstairs kitchen and bathroom floors we decided to head up to the "Sandtrap" Restaurant and enjoy dinner. There is nothing we can do about our little problem until daylight so that's just what we're going to do. Enjoy the rest of our evening, wake up early and try to fix the broken pipe.

Reid and Cathy are hoping to come over tomorrow and join us. Bob and Dy were coming over to Stanwood to see us as well. Now that we're halfway to them, I think they'll be coming here instead. Our intentions are to have our little "problems" fixed before our guests arrive.

I forgot to tell you about my friend Shelly who had the heart surgery on Monday. She is doing well and was able to come home to recuperate. Now lets hope she doesn't get anymore migraines. Our Cousin Eric, who was taken to the hospital from his work at Boeing this week, is also doing well. They haven't determined what made him so sick, but never the less, he's back at work and going strong. Let's hope it stays that way.

I think Relay for Life Kick-Off was a great success last night. There were quite a few people there. Many faces looked new to me. That's what I like to see. Strangers I haven't met yet. By the end of the event gets here I'm sure I'll get a chance to become acquainted with them .

Rick and I are tired already. I think discovering that we have more work to do than we though was the straw that broke the camel's back. I'm getting my jammies on and starting a new book. I'm sure I won't make it past page 5, but I've got a long weekend to work on it.

Sweet Dreams (keep us in your prayers that we find the broken pipe tomorrow morning on the first try)
Dor

Welcome Mr. President

Today as I watched our 44th president being sworn in, I felt an overwhelming sense of a hope and change in our country. I know that we won't see changes immediately, but I'm hopeful that we will work as one nation and make these changes together.

Senator Feinstein (from California) was the woman who was the "host" of today's inauguration. What pleased me most about this was that I've met Senator Feinstein each year at the Bonnie J. Addario Lung Cancer Gala. On August 3, 2007, Senate Resolution 87, a resolution expressing the sense of the United States Senate that the president should declare lung cancer a public health priority was unanimously reconfirmed. Senator Feinstein, along with Senators Chuck Hagel, Hilllary Clinton and a few others brought this resolution to the forefront. Knowing that Senators Feinstein, Hagel and Clinton are such an advocates for this disease gives me hope that cancer will be a priority in our country's health care problem.

This past week when I had my newest scan I found out that my lungs are stable, but other parts of my body are falling apart. I've got some new problems in my pelvis (cysts...not cancerous), my bladder is a mess from all the coughing I've been doing, and I pee every time I cough, or laugh, or giggle or walk... just kidding. Ok, it's really not that bad, but Rick asked me today if I was going to tell the world about these problems since I tell you about everything else. I told him absolutely NOT. Somethings are private. Well, I changed my mind. This is the way it is. Leaky bladder, cysts on my ovaries, rash on my chest...a husband with a bald head a rash on his face and head.... BUY WE'RE ALIVE. So, I'll take all those reminders if I can be here with all of you longer. I'm pretty sure I just shared TMI (too much information) with you, but I hope you'll love me anyway.

Don't forget tomorrow at 5:00 at Starbuck's is the 2009 Relay for Life Kick-Off. If you haven't signed up or don't know much about it, tomorrow will be a great opportunity to learn more. Hope to see you there!

Dreaming Big,
Dor

Wonderful Weekend

What a great weekend it turned out to be. Yesterday Rick and I slept in and got some much needed sleep. In the afternoon I went to a movie with my sister in law. When I got home Amy was here putting a puzzle together with her dad. I made dinner then joined them at the puzzle assembly. We had such a nice time, Amy ended up spending the night here. This afternoon I helped Angie and Shannon recover a seat cushion, visited with them while we all watched football. Dave and Val showed up around 3 and we went to see "Grand Torino" (great movie) then went out for dinner.

This is my week off from treatment and I'm looking forward to recuperating. My body has been really achy this time. My biggest problem is how I can's stop coughing so even if my body starts to feel better, I throw it out of alignment. Lucky for me, I get a massage on Tuesday.

Tomorrow my friend Shelly is having heart surgery to repair a hole. The doctors are hoping that this procedure will eliminate (or at least lessen) her migraine headaches. Pam and I are planning on going to the hospital to be her cheerleaders. Good Luck Shell. We love you.

Rick has been extra tired ~ as have I, so we are heading to bed early. Have a great week and enjoy the sunshine.

Dreaming Big,
Dor

Great News

As many of you knew, I had scans yesterday (which would determine if I could continue on this clinical trial). Remember my favorite word, stable? Well that's what my scan reported. Stable disease. Something I did learn was that the chemo has been wreaking havoc on my liver so if my liver the report came back with my counts being 5 times the normal range, I would have to take a few weeks off before beginning the treatment. Lucky for me, I missed 3 treatments due to weather, wedding and pneumonia....my liver enzymes were back in the normal range. I worried about missing them for NOTHING. All is good here at the Schmitt house. It appears I'll be on the trial for at least 2 more months. I'm thrilled...

After my scan yesterday, my friend Kim and I spent the night in Seattle and went to an early dinner and a movie. Then, back to the room...got our jammies on and talked until the wee hours. Friends need to get together like this more often. It's good for the heart. :) Thanks Kim.

Rick seems to be adjusting to the new treatment. He's still a little bummed about the hair and the rash, but I think with time he'll start to understand that these exterior challenges are only the beginning for a healthy inside. He usually agrees with me in the end..... :)

Jake was my chemo buddy today and we had a great day. Have I mentioned lately how much I love the team of people who work at SCCA making us better? We are so blessed. On our way home from Seattle, we picked Megan up at UW, stopped in Everett for them to get their "official" marriage license, then headed back to Stanwood. They all went to Jimmy's for pizza (while I laid on the couch and slept). After dinner they came home and picked me up and we headed over to watch Angie officiate a girls basketball game at Stanwood. It's still fun to watch her even if she isn't playing.

I think I'll be able to sleep better now that I know things are working as planned. Isn't it about
time for a vacation? I bet I would sleep better on the beaches of the Caribbean.....

Happy Dreams,
Doreen

Happy Anniversary Mom and Dad

I'm so sorry that I didn't write sooner to tell you about our day yesterday. When I got to my appointment, I pleaded to Dr. Eaton to let me have chemo (because I had already missed 3 treatments due to weather, wedding and infection). I didn't need to plead very hard, because he had already decided I could have it. Everything went as planned. I slept like usual, woke up this morning feeling sore in the joints but otherwise pretty good.

Rick had his second treatment with Erbitux (and some other toxins) and he too was sleepy all afternoon and into the early evening. His problem was after midnight when he couldn't sleep at all so he was pretty exhausted today.

Angie and Shannon were little angels with us throughout the day. I need to stop being so stubborn about Rick and I going to these appointments alone. It is so helpful to have another set of ears listening and someone else there to ask questions that we might not think about.

My parents brought dinner to us so when we finally woke up, we had a nice dinner waiting for us. My dad sneaks to our house regularly and does little odd jobs to help make our life easier. Isn't it suppose to be me helping my parents as they get older? This just doesn't make any sense!

Tomorrow is a big day for me. It's a follow up scan that will determine whether or not I can continue with the clinical trial. No matter what the outcome, I'm certain that I will have more options to choose from. If all goes well, I'll have chemo again on Friday.

In closing, I want to wish my Mom and Dad a happy 53rd wedding anniversary. What a wonderful example of love you taught me.

Dreaming Big,
Dor

All is Well

We have all been busy the past two days trying to re-coup. Mom and Dad are both doing well. Both of them had chemo yesterday... which is a good thing. Both of them feel pretty well today, except Dad didn't sleep much last night. Dor will try to get on-line tonight to fill everyone in. In the mean time, know that yesterday went as well as could be.

Dreaming Big-
The Schmitt's

Got Yarn?

The Seattle Cancer Care Alliance is collecting hand-made scarfs and hats for cancer patients. The items are given away, free of charge, to patients who need them. For the past year we have received emails from people who said they were willing to help knit and it has been wonderful.

Two women volunteered to knit hats last year, and they haven't stopped. They just gave us 4 bags of hats and scarfs today to bring to Seattle.Most of us aren't knitters, but if you have extra yarn laying around the house or are willing to purchase some yarn, we would be happy to collect it and ship it to their homes.

If you can help, please contact Angie Schmitt at:
schmitt_12@hotmail.com

Thank you for helping to change lives-
The Schmitt's

Monday Night Update

This year has been challenging. Is it too early to talk about "this year"? Although we are only 12 days into it, I feel comfortable saying this is not exactly the way I was hoping to start the year. Jake's wedding was a great day for our family and friends to get together. We laughed and cried and forgot about cancer.... if only for the day. Since the wedding, cancer has hit us hard and with a vengeance.

Mom's lungs have been working hard for a few years now. It's not just the cancer in her lungs that is bad. She is getting fibrosis which causes the soft spongy tissue of the lungs to get hard. It's difficult to breath when your lungs are hard and refuse to fill with air. On top of that, she has this cruddy infection that is magnifying the whole thing. This pneumonia is causing her to cough more than normal and I see that her lung capacity is compromised if she bends over too quickly or moves up and down stairs. Her lungs don't fill up like ours do.

My dad is just as wonderful as always. He is just as giving and just as loving, but he just doesn't seem like himself. The fatigue and hair loss were bad enough for him to deal with, but now this horribly irritating rash really seems to be a low blow for him. I find myself wanting to say, "It's just hair" or "Who cares about the rash on your head as long as it's working on the inside" but then again, it's not me battling those side effects. I know my dad doesn't care about these issues out of vain, he just wants to live a normal life without having to look in the mirror and be reminded of the cancer. When you are satisfied with the way you look, you feel better. It's that simple.

Tomorrow is a double-chemo day with both of them getting treated in Seattle. Angie and Shannon have both taken the day off of work so they can take them. I have been there on double-chemo days and it's hard to relax if you're by yourself. You are going back and forth between rooms checking on them. I'm really happy that both Angie and Shannon could get tomorrow off so mom and dad will each have company throughout the day. We won't know until mom gets down to the hospital whether or not the pneumonia will prevent her from getting chemo again. I know the missed chemo has been disheartening to her lately. She has missed three chemo treatments since Christmas due to bad weather or feeling ill. If this treatment is held up, she is scheduled for chemo on Friday as well. Jake will be taking her on Friday. She actually has scans and blood work on Thursday and then the results on Friday. If the growth of her tumors is significant they will be pulling her off of the clinical trial. I haven't heard any mention of a backup plan, other than standard chemotherapy, so I certainly hope we get some positive results on Friday.

Lately, I find it difficult to turn off my brain. I think too much and it leaves me overwhelmed. We are all experiencing the same types of things, in our own way. I have seen cancer change people from the inside out. We can't change this process but we can move through this process with them and support the ones we love. In closing I will leave you with a quote I stumbled upon today by Bernie Siegel.

"Diseases can be our spiritual flat tires-disruptions in our lives that seem to be disastrous at the time but end by redirecting our lives in a meaningful way".

Thinking happy thoughts-
Amy

Time to Cash My Reality Check

Most days I wake up and I'm thankful for everything. Yesterday, not so much. Instead it was tearful, emotional, angry....what an ugly way to spend a day. I woke up coughing so hard I ended up in the bathroom throwing up. My temperature was up for a few days but it seems to be stable now. Although the doctors didn't use the word "pneumonia", I'm pretty sure that's what it is. It's an infection in the area of my lung that has the most cancer in it. I guess antibiotics and rest is the best medicine.

On a side note, I want to thank all of you who sent us Haggen gift cards to use toward the co-pays because we have started with a new insurance company this month and my co-pay for the one antibiotic was $70. Yikes. Thanks again. Knowing that co-pays are covered allows us to focus our attention on other things, like getting well.

Rick's rash continues to worsen and he hates it. His hair has virtually fallen out. He continues to work but he is really fatigued. And all of this is after only one round of chemo. It is amazing how hard this erbitux has effected his body. Although hes not thrilled with the reaction it is causing, he still wants to go forward with it.

Rick and I missed brunch at Jake & Megan's yesterday morning, and then we missed Dawn's 40th Birthday Party. We were feeling down and tired. We thought we could use a day resting around the house more than we needed anything else. Exposing ourselves to extra germs was our biggest concern. Missing these events made me emotional because I felt like cancer won for the day.

Cancer could keep us in the house, but it couldn't keep our loved ones out. Vickie stopped by to visit. She was like a little angel. It seemed as though she brought her beauty shop to our house. She cut my hair and gave rick a pedicure. Angie and Shannon stopped by around that time so they got hair cuts too. We played guitar hero, laughed, and had a good time.... considering. My friend Lynell stopped by to check on us and it was much appreciated. I know we are surrounded by good people and we don't take that for granted.

Today we had another day of lounging around the house. Just so you don't think I'm really a slob, I cleaned up and changed into clean pajamas. :) Jeff and Dawn stopped by tonight with the girls to visit. Amy stopped by on her way home from military training in Tacoma. I've attached a picture of Darlena and Amy, sharing her uniform. Rick went to the office for a while tonight to work on a quick project. He promised not to be out long.

I will write more tomorrow. I hope everyone had a great weekend.

Dream Big-

Dor

Chemo Free Friday

I wasn't feeling well when I went to SCCA on Friday (with Pam and Jake). After my blood work they discovered that my white count wasn't right and it sounded like something was going on in my lungs (duh?). My doc sent me to x-ray and it was discovered that I have something (infection) going on in my lungs so instead of chemo they put me on an antibiotic.

The good news is, Pam's 6th month check-up was GREAT! Clean bill of health for the next 6 months.

The bad news, Jake was in with me while they accessed my port and drew blood....I thought he was going DOWN>>>> his face turned white, he started sweating and said, Mom "I think I'll skip that part from now on".

Our town is still fighting the flood with hopes that it is going to subside soon.

Dreaming Big,
Dor

Where is the little dutch boy when we need him?

Stanwood needed a little dutch boy to put his finger in the dike and save our town from a flood. I guess he had other plans. I'm going to attach some photos of what our little community looked like today (and I'm not sure it's as high as it's going to get). Most people have done a good job preparing for the flood to come, but others just prefer staying at home and riding out the storm.

I'm attaching some photos I took while I was out on a drive with Cathy today. We had a funeral to attend today and it was cancelled, so instead we accessed our town and took photos!

Notice in the first photo how much of the street signs are actually sticking out of the water...The little blue thing on the right of that photo is a bus stop. I don't think a bus will be picking anyone up anytime soon. :( Photo 2 was taken near our fire station at Forest Land Service. Pretty much everything at their business was underwater. Oh, what a mess they'll have when the water clears. Photo 3 is Jacob's classroom at Stanwood Middle School. They've placed sandbags near the doors, but he may have a mess when he returns to school on Monday. (school was cancelled again tomorrow)

I'd better get to bed soon since it's chemo day again tomorrow. Pam is taking me because she has a follow up appointment around the same time I have my infusion. I've gotta meet her at 7:30 in Smokey Point.

Angie and Shannon came over tonight and brought Rick 2 new hats. We had strawberry topped waffles for dinner, watched the National Championship game and played Apples to Apples. It was a great night. I want to start having family game night more often.

Stay safe and dry. Don't drive your car through standing water. Help sandbag if you've got some free time. Preform a random act of kindness. You'll be amazed how much better you'll feel after you've helped someone else.

Love you more,

Dor

Great Day at the Doctor's Office

Before we arrived at the doctor's office this morning, I told Amy and Rick..."no matter what we hear today we can't get "down" about it". We knew that Rick's tumor marker (a blood test called CEA) was rising each time they did blood work. That is generally a sign that the cancer is growing. We just didn't know how bad his body would look inside. What we found out was although some of the tumors looked a little bigger, they also appeared to be empty cavities. That was a sign that the cancer was trying to grow but the old chemo was apparently do some work. We also know that in the past 10 days (after his new drug Erbitux) Rick has been losing his hair and getting a rash. (Both of these are typical side effects) These are both great signs that the new drug is working. The doctor was really pleased with the reaction Rick's body is already having. He said he doesn't' usually see results like this until at least the 2nd round of treatments. It's been proven that people who's bodies develop the rash have better results on the inside of their body as well. I couldn't be happier....Rick is just wearing more hats and will start taking some new meds to try and keep the rash at a minimum.

My chemo was uneventful yesterday. Today I feel achy and fatigued, but those are easy things to deal with. Take some Tylenol and a nap and you're good to go. I learned at my appointment yesterday that next Friday (after my scan on Thursday) they will assess my progress with this treatment and determine whether or not they will continue it. I've assured them that I'm feeling great and I KNOW it's working so we could just skip the scan if they want...no such luck. This is a clinical trial and they have to check EVERYTHING.

You know that old saying "when it rains it pours?" well in Stanwood we say, "when it rains, it floods". They have started to evacuate the downtown area (where my parents live), and they've taken all the people from our "nursing home" to the gymnasium of our high school. The Red Cross has set up camp at the high school as well so, school in Stanwood has been cancelled again. The way it's been going around here, they'll be in school until July. Ugh! A few years back, Rick and I were at the High School helping set up cots, hauling in food and gear and nursing home patients until the wee hours of the morning. I know our help was appreciated by the Red Cross and the School District. I would love to have the energy to be over there again tonight helping out but ~ I know my limits.

Thank you for all the prayers you've sent these past few day (and years). We are so grateful for the support and love we get from all of you. I'm not sure how we would have survived without you :)

Love you more than all the rivers cresting in Washington...

Dreaming Big,
Dor

Sleepy in Seattle

It's Amy. I am with mom and dad at Melana's condo in Seattle. They have both been sleeping in the livingroom, uncomfortably, for the past hour. I was afraid to wake them for fear they wouldn't fall back to sleep, but mom woke up a few minutes ago and they are both resting comfortably in the bedroom now.

Although mom is the one who had chemo today, dad isn't feeling very well. Mom seems fine, just a little bit tired. This round of chemo, at least the first few hours of it, doesn't seem to be knocking her off of her feet like the past few rounds have. The couple of treatments she had off around the wedding probably helped to lower the toxicity in her body. I hope this round continues to cooperate with her body... while still continuing to work!

My dad had blood work and a CT scan today. I will join him and mom tomorrow morning back at the Seattle Cancer Care Alliance for the test results. He sure doesn't seem to be feeling well this past week. We are hoping that means the new stuff is working. He is starting to get some of the side effects of this chemo. Side effects are never good, but if it means it is attacking the tumors the way it is attacking the rest of his body, we are moving in the right direction.

Sometimes it's tough to find something positive to write about. I must say, it helps to know that we are surrounded by so much love and kindness. Cancer is a crippling disease for not only the cancer patients, but the people in their lives as well. We can all use a dose of "medicine" every now and then. Sometimes it's chemo, sometimes it's ice cream, and sometimes it's just a big hug or a thoughtful prayer. Thanks again for being the medicine this family needs to get thru another day.

Holding strong-
Amy

Chemo Eve

It's going to be an early night tonight since we have to be in Seattle by 8:20am. Rick is already asleep on the couch. I don't think he's been feeling well lately but he never complains and when I ask, he just says "I'm fine". It has been 2 years since he started chemo and I think the routine is starting to take it's tole on him.

Jake stopped by on his way home tonight. Just as I had imagined, he's very tan from his honeymoon. Those Schmitt kids only have to be in a warm location and I swear they start to get brown.

Angie and Shannon came over after dinner tonight and visited for a while. I haven't seen the girls in over a week so it was nice to see them. We watched the Fiesta Bowl together (because football never ends at our house)

I've been feeling good lately and I just realized that I haven't had chemo since the Tuesday before the wedding. I'm sure the break was good for my body but I need to get back on track so these drugs can do their job.

I'm not sure if you'll hear from me tomorrow night (I could be sleeping...my usual day of chemo behavior. I promise to write on Wednesday to let you know how Rick's scans turned out.

Thanks for all your love and support,
Dreaming Dor

800th Blog

Wow. Can you believe that I've written 800 blog entries? That is a lot of rambling, oops, I mean typing. When I first started writing this blog in April of 2006 the blog site said it could only hold 1,000 entries. My next goal....outlive my website limit.

Last night we celebrated with our friend Ann who will be leaving for Iraq on Friday. Ann is a longtime friend who is in the Air Force Reserves and is the mother of 2 sets of twins. Although she's been preparing for a journey like this for a long time, it's hard not to worry about her while she's gone. She is a nurse and assures me that she'll be in a safe area. Safe area in Iraq? Is that possible? Well, I'll worry about her the entire times she's gone anyway.

This will be another busy week in Seattle. I have chemo on Tuesday, Rick has scans on Tuesday and will get test results on Wednesday. My hope is that the tumors have remained stable... But no matter what, they have started the new chemo routine so we should see some changes soon. I have scans next week so we'll learn more about how my clinical trial is working then.

Jake and Megan made it home safely from their honeymoon. They had a great time, but tomorrow it's time to get back to the daily grind with work and school.

We still have snow from the past couple weeks and it's starting to come down again. As much as I love snow...I'm done with it for the year. It makes me nervous to have my kids all driving to their jobs and it makes me nervous to drive anywhere.

I tried to download some photos to share with you but somethings not working tonight. Maybe it's the computer operator?

Love you more than all the snowflakes that are falling...
Dreaming Big,
Dor

Date Night with Dave and Val

Every year we promise to get together with