When I woke up this morning, the first thing on my mind was my CT scan on Tuesday. I dread waiting for it, then waiting for the results. I've discovered that WAITING has really become a bother to me. After a little daily meditation and careful thought, I realized...waiting is nothing more than a word.
When I sat in line behind 2 cars and WAITED for my tall, non-fat, no whip, extra hot, 1 pump peppermint, mocha this morning, it didn't bother be. As a matter of fact, I didn't mind the wait. Then, I went to the bank to make a deposit and WAITED behind 3 people who were also doing their weekend business and I thought, this wait isn't bad (and how lucky we are that we have money to deposit). Wait #2, painless. I just put dinner in the oven and it should be done in about 30 minutes. Again, a WAIT without grief. When my wait is over, we'll have full tummies and the peace of mind that we are able to have food on our table.
I know each time I have a scan that I'll have to wait for something. The truth is... I'm always waiting for the same thing. It shouldn't hurt. I doesn't hurt. The results might sting a bit if they don't turn out like I'd hoped but then we just go on to a new plan.
I'm taking the power out of the word WAIT. Think of all the joyous things we get out of waiting; babies and puppies, airplane and ferry rides, heating up the BBQ. Each of these things gives us something to look forward to. A future, a vacation, a good meal.
Now that doesn't mean I'm not still a little anxious about test results, but I'm hoping after this little talk I've had with myself that I will be able to let go of the unknown and patiently wait for whatever comes my way.
Feeling better every day and looking forward to our little vacation in the sun with Bob, Dy, Dave and Val.