Thursday, August 21, 2008

Good Evening Friends and Family

Today I purged. In a good way. I went through closets, and drawers, and boxes...then had a fashion show with friends who stopped by. I made them try on clothes that no longer fit (and if they did...they had to take them home)I came to the conclusion that I am who I am and I must be happy with this body. She is alive. I'm not the sickly woman who wore a size 8. As a matter of fact I skipped right by skinny clothes as a kid. I've got a big heart and I need a body that can handle it. Ok, I think I'm done now. Dammit!

With all the emotion that's been running wild around our house, I had a mini melt-down last night that I carried with me throughout the day. I came home after my appointment, thrilled with the results but feeling sad for Rick that he hasn't had those same kind of positive appointments. I know Rick is happy that I'm happy, but I need him to feel the same kind of hope I do. Today, I never got out of my PJ's until Lynell called and asked me to go for a walk. I was more than happy to put on my walking shoes and get some fresh air.

I can't believe that Angie and Jake will be starting school next week. They have been working on their classrooms for weeks now, but they're looking forward to the kids that will be filling their rooms. Angie's school is still working on their contract (I sure hope they don't go on strike again...unless it's necessary) and I believe Stanwood's contract is all settled.

Next Monday will be a day filled with tests, scans, blood work, Pet scans, questionnaires, etc. Once that day is over, I think Rick and I have 5 days in a row without any cancer related meetings, events, or appointments to attend. Maybe we should take a vacation?

I'd better sign off now. It's time to get out there and walk 5 miles of frustration off. I have a lot more than that to work off, but I don't' want to mame my walking partner in the process.

Dreaming with my new walking shoes on,


Heather said...

If anyone is entitled to have a day in her PJ's, an afternoon of purging, several meltdown moments ... it's most certainly YOU! Keep on walkin'! (Picture of your walking shoes?)

Anonymous said...

I LOVE the line " I have a big heart and I need a body that can handle it"! I think that my be my new motto in life!! You just keep teaching me new things every time I read this. God bless you and Rick, your love and your health.
a friend in Oregon, Karen J.