Numb

Here is a photo of Rick in the doctor's office while we were waiting for the results...Gosh, he's cute. The other photos are of my Tarceva Twin Diana and I, then one of her husband Kelly and Rick.

Numb is the only way I can describe my day. I didn't sleep well last night (surprise, surprise) so getting up this morning was easy. I was still awake.... I got up, got dressed, Cathy came over with some flowers and stayed for a cup of tea, Pam stopped by with flowers and a hug. I watched my nieces while my sister-in-law went to the oral surgeon, attended my great nieces choir concert, stopped at Costco then came home. Angie came by tonight to visit. That was it. I searched for joy...but like the groundhog on Feb. 2nd, it didn't come out to play.

Rick didn't sleep well either, but he seemed peaceful while I was watching him sleep around 3:00 this morning. He is walking around in a bit of a haze (apparently he takes after his wife) and we are all still trying to swallow yesterdays news.

I remember the wise words of Amy back in April of 2006....she said "the fact that we are dealing with stage 4 cancer only makes the survivor stories we'll have to share that much greater 10 years from now". I won't lie. We're scared. Worried. Mad. And Ready. (I was going to use some swear words but you get the idea...) Again, this whole cancer thing is not something new around our house. We've known about it for a long time...we just forget about it every once in a while.

I'm bobbing my head at the computer trying to stay awake. I think that is a signal to go to bed.

Love you more,
Dor