Today was one of those days when you just have to say, Aaahhhh....
I started my morning with a massage, ran a few errands, had taco Tuesday with "the old girls", came home and cleaned a few things, made a big batch of Chicken D, started packing my things for St. Louis (I leave in the middle of the night on Thursday), went to dinner with Morgan, Corey, Kelly and Ricky. I got a lot done and I enjoyed all the visiting I fit in to my already busy day.
Tomorrow (Wednesday) is the beginning of my NEW ADVENTURE. My friend Jana Shaughnessy is going to be my HOV partner, Seattle Cancer Care Buddy, and support system for my day of tests and scans. We'll start the morning at SCCA getting an MRI of my brain. Before we can start the clinical trial they have to rule out any brain metastases. (No one thinks I have anything bad going on in there...as a matter of fact, we're not even sure I have very many brains left...it's all for safety sake) After the brain MRI, we head to the CT department where I'll drink a bunch of chalky tasting liquid so they can get clear pictures of my lungs, abdomen, pelvis (and anything in between). Oh, did I mention I can't eat anything for 4 hours before my CT scan which is at 2:30, and when I could be having a bite to eat I'll be in the MRI machine. Hey, tomorrow might be the first day of my new diet.... :) After the full body CT scan we head over to the University of Washington for my eye exam. They need to check my eyes carefully before we begin the chemo because it can cause some eye problems and they need to have some idea of how healthy my eyes are to begin with. Perhaps, I should bring a little knitting? I might have some free time in the waiting rooms.
When I go to St. Louis I don't think I'll be bringing my laptop. It's a pain going through security with it and I'll be so busy I probably won't even plug it in. I'll try to keep in touch with Rick and the kids. Hopefully, I can get one of them to let you know how things are going. If not, I'll tell you all about everything on Sunday when I return.
I had a couple of mini meltdowns today. I think mostly because we're actually starting the process of the new drug trial. I think I'm also having a little anxiety about not taking the Tarceva. It's been my best friend for the past 30 months and I haven't taken it for a week now. I don't feel any different, it's just a mental thing. I do feel that this treatment plan we're changing to is the right thing for me. When given the opportunity to keep living, it's hard to say...no I think I'll wait a little longer.
Until tomorrow, keep dreaming big dreams...
Love you much,